We don’t know whether we should call this creation a Nissan Patrol or a Volkswagen Bus at this point, but it gets very muddy and that’s all that really matters.

Remember this thing? The Nissan Patrol that wrecked the Porsche 918 in the final episode of The Grand Tour?

In an era that seems dominated by cynicism and corporate greed, the story of some Nissan engineers spending nights and weekends to restore a piece of automotive history “just because” is enough to lift anyone’s spirits. Behold: the 1987 Nissan Patrol Fanta Limon Paris-Dakar rally car, returned to its former racing…

If you’re not familiar with the off-road vehicles Australians consider “iconic,” here’s your chance to see how well four of the all-time greatest hold up against the outback. And if you do know these trucks, you know they’ll be fun to watch.

And that’s even though Nissan totally wimped out on the truck’s specifications.

The Nissan Patrol is basically an old-school off-road capable SUV popular in the Middle East, Australia and other markets that aren’t ours. Many of these trucks are modified to go dirt driving and dune bashing. This one is built for speed.

Recovering a stuck truck is serious business; there’s a lot of weight and energy at work and if you don’t take safety seriously you can end up like these idiots: dodging a flying steel projectile for dear life.

In most places the 2015 Nissan Patrol is a close cousin of the Infiniti QX80 we have now in America; lots of curves and luxury accessories. But a few markets are holdouts for the old bodystyle; taking us to simpler time when SUVs were square and having two temperature control knobs was a privilege not a right.

The Infiniti QX80 Limited gets kicked down to the kid’s table of luxury SUVs because look at it. But drive the thing and all of a sudden you’re Shallow Hal discovering the majesty of inner beauty. And it goes even deeper than the quilt-stitched seats.

This morning some kind of monster left a Mocha Almond turd on the road in front of my house. Naturally I went rooting around to see if it had eaten anything interesting, but I ended up inside a spectacular cavern of quilted leather and soft wood.

What Americans might vaguely recognize as an Infiniti QX80 is sold in the U.A.E. as the Nissan Patrol, and it’s one of the most popular SUVs in the region. So to pimp their Nismo performance brand in Dubai, Nissan decided to pass on another sports car and slap some splitters on this behemoth.

I am currently in the deep depths of a Nissan Patrol obsession. It is not healthy.

The 2015 Infiniti QX80 has been subtly tweaked to look a little more closely related to the Q50 sedan and get a larger rear bumper. It's a little sleeker up front, but the style is still polarizing. A "Limited" trim with even more chrome will also join the lineup for 2015.