The "Washington DC" 24 Hours of LeMons race (held at Summit Point Motorsports Park in West Virginia) took place a couple of weeks back, and it was one of the all-time best!
First of all, a huge German luxury car took the overall win, then a Subaru-engined East German car won the Index of Effluency, we had our first-ever supercharged GM 3800 and the first-ever BMW V12-powered Ford Thunderbird... and after that we enjoyed a machine-gun-versus-Chrysler-Sebring Second Amendment Extravaganza. Gotta love West Virginia's lax full-automatic-weapons policies (and the cheapness of used Sebrings).
Next weekend, get ready for the B.F.E. Grand Prix in Colorado; I was AWOL at the last couple races— something about getting married— but the LeMons Supreme Court will be in full arbitrary-justice effect at High Plains Raceway.
Not enough LeMons action for you? Check out the top lemons of past races: Altamont '07 • Arse Freeze '07 • Altamont '08 • Ohio '08 • New England '08 • South '08 • Texas '08 • Arse Freeze '08 • Texas Spring '09 • South Spring '09 • Reno '09 • New Orleans '09 • New England '09 • Buttonwillow '09 • South Fall '09 • Ohio '09 • Texas Fall '09 • Arse Freeze '09 • Phoenix '10 • South Winter '10 • Texas Winter '10 • Sears Point '10 • Detroit '10 • New Orleans '10 • Goin' For Broken '10 • South Spring '10 • Dallas Summer '10
Photographs by Nick Pon, Team Big Red, and FinalGear.
Disclosure: Murilee Martin gets crazy baksheesh for his work on the 24 Hours of LeMons Supreme Court
1. Sgt Schultz Zwei, Mercedes-Benz S500
Winner on laps
2. Duct Tape Motorsports, BMW 318iS
Winner, Class Good
3. Tiger's First PGA (Probably Gettin' Arse) Racing, Mercury Cougar XR7
Winner, Class Bad
Winner, Least Horrible Yank Tank
4. Team Paisley, Subaru Impreza
5. Mod Squad Racing, Toyota MR2
6. Team Pro-Crash-Duh-Nation, Alfa Romeo Milano
7. Near-Orbital Space Monkeys, BMW 528e
8. The Volvo ElCowMino, Volvo 240
Winner, Grassroots Motorsports Most From The Least award
9. Government Motors Racing, Mazda 626
10. Deconstruction, BMW 318
11. Dai Mondai II, Toyota Corolla
12. Booby Prize Racing, Nissan 200SX
13. FASTish & The FURRiest, Volvo 240
14. Keystone Kops, Volvo 240
15. The B Team, Ford Escort LX
16. Nemesis Ridiculi, Nissan 240SX
17. Track Pillagerz!, Buick Le Sabre
18. Cow Patch Kidz, Audi 80
19. World Class Motorsports Livers, Geo Storm
20. The Bridesmaids, BMW 535i
Winner, Big Tool award
21. Ricky Bobby/Laughing Clown Malt Liquor, Ford Thunderbird Turbo Coupe
22. Greenhouse Gassholes, BMW 325e
23. Rusty Bolt Racing, Porsche 944
24. Track Daze of Thunder, Volkswagen GTI
25. Fissure Brothers Racing, Toyota Celica
26. No Whammies, Honda CRX
27. Ghetto Motorsports, Eastern Chapter, Chevrolet Malibu
28. Team Cardorks, Acura Integra
29. Shallow Pockets Racing, Volkswagen Golf
30. Team Margaritaville, BMW 325
31. Schumacher Taxi Service - Revenge of the CoROLLa, Toyota Corolla FX-16
32. Big Red, Geo Metro Convertible
Winner, Class Ugly
33. Elmo's Revenge, Saturn SL2
34. Gasholes, Ford Mustang
35. Obamacare, BMW 325iS
36. MTV's Jersey Shore Racing Team, Dodge Daytona ES
37. Sinical Racing, BMW 325i
38. Team 44 Cup, Porsche 944
39. FML Motorsports, Ford Mustang
40. Overengineer'd Racing, BMW 325i
41. Morrows Auto & Woodstock's NAStiCAR Quest For the Holy Nickelbag, Pontiac Grand Prix
Winner, Best Carbureted
42. DIRTy e-Thirties, BMW 325e
43. Final Gear: Bootleggin' It, Pontiac Grand Prix
44. Days Of Plunder, Saturn SC2
45. Metro-Dade Vice Squad, Mazda RX-7
46. We Are Fubar, Pontiac Grand Prix
47. The Nerd Herd, Infiniti J30
48. Please Start! Racing, Plymouth Acclaim
49. Nutjob Racing, Honda Civic Wagovan
50. Huntin' Tewwowist Wabbits, Mitsubishi Eclipse
51. Maryland Scratchers, BMW 535i
52. Team Chickin Lickin, BMW 325
53. BuckSnort Racing, BMW E30
54. Funky Kong, Fiat X1/9
55. Misfit Toys Racing, Wartburg 311
Winner, Index of Effluency award
56. Dorks of Hazard, Dodge Charger
57. Mannschaft Panzers, Audi 4000 Quattro
58. Dai Mondai I, Toyota MR2
59. GoGodyne Racing, Nissan 300ZX
60. DOS Boot Racing, Volkswagen GTI
61. The Meat Wagon, Honda Civic
62. Team Police Brutality, Lincoln Mark VIII
Quickest lap time of race (1:55.113)
63. Team Cosworthless, Ford Escort
64. Schumacher Taxi Service: GI Slow, Toyota MR2
65. Scuderia Fluffball, Fiat 128
Winner, Organizer's Choice award
66. The Lemon Juicers, Ford Mustang LX
67. Team Self-Tapping Screws, Chevrolet Camaro
68. Top Fool Elemonator, Subaru Impreza
69. DeCuzzi Racing Tele tubby formerly Speed Racer Style, Pontiac Fiero
70. Morrows Auto & Snoopy's Quest For the Holy Nickelbag, GMC 1-ton Van
71. Trophy Wife Racing, Toyota MR2
72. Oil Pains, Pontiac Grand Am
73. ReVolvolution Racing, Volvo 850 Wagon
74. Adopted By Jets, Saab 99
75. Team Nein24, Porsche 924
Winner, Judges' Choice award
76. BoneYard Racing, Dodge Neon
77. The E-Lemon-ators, Mercury Cougar
Winner, Heroic Fix Award
78. Pimpalicious, Cadillac Seville SLS
79. Baghdad Taxi, Honda CRX
80. Scuderia Limoni, Alfa Romeo Milano Verde
81. Champions On Fire, Nissan 240SX
82. Stugots Racing, Ford Thunderbird
83. F.A.C.E. Racing, Pontiac Fiero
84. Team Police Brutality - Beating Up Breast Cancer, Ford Thunderbird