It seems like the very worst drivers on the road are the ones that think they're the next Mario Andretti. Jalopnik readers are here to help them see the light.
Welcome back to Answers of the Day - our daily Jalopnik feature where we take the best ten responses from the previous day's Question of the Day and shine it up to show off. It's by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers. Enjoy!
Yesterday we saw a video where a Volvo driver was held up behind a motorcycle cruise with over 400 riders taking up two lanes. The Volvo driver got impatient and tried to pass the bikes in the dirt of the shoulder. Unsurprisingly, the car didn't make a good offroader and spun out across the road, crashing in the median and almost taking out a number of bikes.
It wasn't just one party being an asshole; everyone in the situation was being an idiot. Two wrongs made an even bigger wrong.
The moral of the story is that driving on the road isn't an us-versus-them kind of situation. If you find yourself thinking that everyone else is always coming out of nowhere, cutting you off, or going way too slow, you might just be the one that's going too fast and driving crazy.
Now, these ten tips should help you come to terms with being a bad driver, but there are plenty more that we didn't have room for on this list. Let us know in Kinja below what we forgot.
Photo Credit: YouTube
10.) You Can Eat An Entire Happy Meal While Putting On Makeup And Talking On The Phone
Your "skill" at driving while doing a hundred different things that aren't paying attention to what's in front of you isn't really a good thing.
Suggested By: Jstas, Photo Credit: Shutterstock
9.) You're Missing A Door Mirror
There's really only one way to lose a door mirror and that's to break it off when you weren't paying attention to where you were going.
8.) Your Bumpers Have More Than Three Colors On Them
If you've picked up paint from three different cars, you're probably a bad driver.
7.) Everyone Is Passing You On The Right
At a certain point when you find yourself wondering why there are so many assholes on the highway passing on the right, you need to realize that you cruising int he left lane is the real problem.
6.) You Think Your Camry Is A Sports Car
The more you try and convince me that your Camry is "grounded to the ground," the more I imagine you weaving through traffic at 93 miles an hour.
Suggested By: Stig-a-saw-us-wrecks
5.) Your Car Has a Cigarette Lighter That Works And Three Lights That Don't
When you know your cigarette lighter still works, but you've let three of your lights go out, you have bad priorities about maintenance. You just might be a terrible driver.
4.) Your Clutch Keeps Wearing Out, And Your Brakes, And The Sidewalls Of Your Tires
If you wonder why all the parts on your car keep wearing out, no matter what car you buy, it's not the car. It's you. If you have ever been on r/justrolledintotheshop, it's the same story.
3.) All Your Friends Offer To Drive
If all of your friends offer to drive home every time, they're probably terrified of being in the car with you behind the wheel.
2.) Your Friends Get Quiet When You Say You're A Good Driver
First of all, if you are constantly telling people that you're a great driver, how you always zoom past slower traffic and how everyone else is awful on the road, then you probably suck. If your friends get really, politely quiet when you say it, that's another sign.
1.) You Get Into A Lot Of Not-Your-Fault Accidents
Here's a tip: if you've been in a bunch of accidents that are "not your fault, I swear," you need to recognize that you're probably responsible. You can only have so many bumps, scrapes, and crashes before you realize you're the real source of the problem.