The best bars are typically hidden in quiet corners of neighborhoods filled with strips of drinkeries, like Delilah's in Chicago hidden from the Fratdaddy haunts on Clark. College bars aren't typically the best, but they're abundant and filled with college students so you can usually find one to suit your needs. There's the fake I.D. undergrad bar, the get-drunk-and-make mistakes sorority night spot, emo places full of pseudointellectual discussions and the rare townie-cum-gradstudent bar. I'd like to pretend I spent most of my time in the latter, but in reality while at college I spent just as many nights at the Fratdaddy haunt of Cain & Abel's. If you can't make the link between that and today's COTD from Tempesjo on my Porsche 911 Carrera S review then you need to pick better bars.

And Ray knew his Camaro; and it conceived, and bare Matt, and said, I have gotten a man from Ray.
And it again bare his brother Wes. And Wes was a lover of speed, but Matt loved to putter around town in his Volvo 240.
And in process of time it came to pass, that Matt wrote an offering unto Ray, titled "The Joy of Driving Slow."
And Wes, he also wrote an offering to Ray, titled "The Joy of Driving Fast." And Ray had respect unto Wes and to his offering.
But unto Matt and to his offering he had not respect. And Matt was very wroth, and his countenance fell.
And Ray said unto Matt, Why art thou wroth? And why is thy countenance fallen? If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou mayest rule over him.
And Matt talked with Wes: and it came to pass, when they were in the parking lot, that Matt rose up against Wes, and stole the keys to the Porsche that Ray had commanded Wes to review, and Matt tied up Wes and threw him in the back of his Volvo.
And Ray tweeted unto Matt, Where is Wes thy brother? And he said, I know not: Am I my brother's keeper?
And he said, What hast thou done? The voice of thy brother's blood-starved loins crieth unto me from the back of your 240.
And now art thou cursed on Jalopnik, and when thou write an article, it shall not henceforth yield any page views.
And Matt said unto Ray, My punishment is greater than I can bear.
But in his banishment, Matt toiled over his netbook, and wrote "2010 Porsche 911 Carrera S: First Drive," which he offered to Ray.
And Ray embraced Matt and said, "This is beautiful. All is forgiven."

The next chapter of this involves Ray banishing me from the Holy Land when I turn in $200 in gas receipts.

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