“In April of 1993 I took my 1989 Firebird on a driving tour of the western United States. I’d planned it for months and it was a big deal for me because up to that time I’d never been out of the Midwest. In Colorado my plan was to take Highway 550 south from Montrose to Durango. Upon arriving at Ouray, Highway 550 heads sharply up the mountains to Silverton. I drove right by a big, flashing warning sign that said, ‘Four wheel drive or tire chains required after this point.’ The way I figured it, there couldn’t be anything up there that I hadn’t already dealt with previously in my driving life. After all I’d been driving Firebirds exclusively through all my Illinois winters thus far, how bad could it be?
“So I ventured on cautiously. I came to find out later that not only is this a very bad idea, but additionally I didn’t know it’s actually illegal when those signs are displaying flashing lights. I was about to get an education. About four miles into the climb south of Ouray, my Firebird simply stopped moving forward. Deteriorating ice conditions provided no traction to combat the incline of the highway. To make matters worse, I had gotten the car crossed up nearly perpendicular in the road trying to make headway; any attempt to maneuver only made the car slide further down the hill. If I’ve ever come close to having a panic attack in my life, this was the time. The road was quite narrow, and the only thing serving as a guardrail was the plowed-up snowbank along the highway edge. I don’t remember exactly how but I did eventually get the car straightened out. I put the car in neutral (on the ice, with those tires, the brakes would not control reverse), and carefully rolled slowly backward more that a mile down the mountain. I made it to a lookout where I was finally able to turn around, and drive back down to Ouray.
“I asked one of the locals for the best alternative route around the mountains, as well as the naïve question, was it always like this around here. She looked at me as if I was insane and replied, ‘It rains, it snows, it’s spring.’ My detour would take me around 60 miles out of my way through southwest Colorado, finally meeting up with my originally planned route at Cortez.
“Many years later, I came to find out that the stretch of Highway 550 on which I got stuck (also called the Million Dollar Highway) is considered by some to be the most dangerous stretch of road in the United States. I’d like to give it another try someday, but maybe like in August, thank you very much.”
Can you blame the road or the tools you had? Either way, that’s a hell of a story.
