For $3,500, Vaya Con Dios

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Despite its fervently religious livery, today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe HiJet doesn't require an act of faith to appreciate its cuteness. It's price on the other hand may need divine intervention.

The most common comment about yesterday's one of ten 1991 Marlboro Syclone was no. That was followed by Hell no, with oh Hellz no close behind. In the end, the consensus seemed to be that the tobacco connection didn't warrant it asking, and that manifested in a massive 87% Crack Pipe vote. Today we're not just going for a smoke-free environment, we're also going to dip into that old time religion.


They say hate the sin, and love the sinner. I don't know about that, after all, isn't it really all about what the original sin involved? I mean, if the sin was robbing a little old lady then screw that guy. In fact, burn in Hell, you dick! If, on the other hand the sin is getting busy with the delightful and dreamy Scarlett Johansson - she's married, right, so that would be wrong? - then I think I could cut the sinner some slack, if only to hear the details.

Do you think it a sin to use the diminutive canvas of a 1995 Daihatsu (gesundheit) HiJet to express your faith? If so, you may hate today's Miami-located van, but you might still remain emotionally attached to its seller.

I don't know about you, but I totally dig the Jesus murals on this child's toy-like bus, and my lack of faith frightens nuns. The HiJet was of course never officially imported to the United States, and in fact by the time this one was built, Daihatsu (gesundheit) had officially left the market here, having closed their doors in 1992.


That of course doesn't mean that a few of these little tykes haven't made their way here, and as this one happens to be in South Florida one can assume that it arrived by way of one of the Caribbean islands, where these things are rife. That would mean that it's three cylinder engine is the big daddy 99c-cc version and not the JDM's 550.

Backing that up is a 4-speed stick, and the seller says that he's redone the interior, including a pair of leather BMW seats, but doesn't provide pictures of his work. There are plenty of shots of the outside however, and of the fours sides three are painted in what could best be described as un tributo a dios.


Maybe all the Latin expressions of faith aren't your cup of tea. That doesn't mean however, you wouldn't appreciate the tiny 7-spoke alloy wheels masking even tinier drum brakes, or hysterically impractical rear wing. I mean who wouldn't? Getting to appreciate all that in your own driveway may rest on your particular state's rules on illegal aliens. Florida it seems has no such restrictions and you could conceivably register a flaming tanker full of toxic waste there if you know the right genuflection.


The ad notes that the car has taken a vow of non-operation but does get a weekly crank to keep the battery from going flat. Despite that parsimonious use it's said to run fine and get better mileage than most hybrids, although that might be seen as boasting which as we all know is frowned upon by the FSM.

The seller is praying that someone will pay $3,500 for his cute as a bug biblical billboard, and you now need to testify where or not you think he stands a snowball's chance in Hell of getting that. What do you think, is this Daihatsu (gesundheit) HiJet worth that kind of cash? Or, is this religious icon digging too deep at the root of all evil?


You decide!


Miami Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.

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