For $3,295, This Porsche is Hot, Black, Maroon and Chrome

Illustration for article titled For $3,295, This Porsche is Hot, Black, Maroon and Chrome
Nice Price Or No DiceIs this used car a good deal? You decide!

It's a Porsche, it's a Volkswagen, It's a... If they ever make a movie out of Today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe 914, Faye Dunaway could play the lead, and hopefully Jack Nicholson would driver her.

Like today's candidate, yesterday's Pontiac Fiero Mera sported a mid-mounted engine. Unlike today's so fugly-it's-endearing original's body, that Mera attempted to strike a pose once perfected by an Italian fashion model, but one that was sadly unappreciated on the runways of today's Jalopnik. An overwhelming 88% Crack Pipe loss proved it just wasn't destined to be America's Next Top Model.


Originally intended to replace BOTH the VW Karmann Ghia, and the Porsche 912, the mid-engined 914 ended up being the red-headed stepchild between the two parents as the interest of each waned. In Europe, the car carried both brand's badges on the VW-powered 4-cylinder model, while the flat six, adopted and adapted from Porsche's rear-engine 911, presented itself as singularly from the house of P.

In the U.S., where such cross pollination is greeted with furrowed brows and assertions of its unconstitutionality, the 914 was marketed only as a Porsche, and did for a time supplant the four cylinder version of the 901, the 912. This 1972 914 would have been co-branded had it been intended for the continent, but as it's an American Apparent it gets the Porsche shield despite its VW-built engine. And it's that engine where this Craigslist ad goes all wonky. The seller claims that the engine is a 1.8, however in '72, the 914 could only be had with either the VW 1.7-litre 80-bhp four, shared with the 411E, or Porsche's 2.0-litre six. The 1.8 didn't debut until '74, and then it came with fuel injection, not the 2 barrel Progressive carberator of the seller's claim. So probably the car is a 1.7, and has pushed this Porsche to its 80,000 miles. Not to fear about future failure though because the seller assures us the engine has been completely repainted. He also says it has a new intake system and battery box, which is a good thing as a major design flaw of the 914 is the protection of the battery being left to an expanded metal grille which wasn't really up to the job. Battery acid destruction of the parts below, including massive rust of the uni-body can occur, although this car seems to have dodged that bullet. All 914 came with a five speed stick, and the pre-‘73s with their rear-actuators were plagued with shift action that's like trying to do the nasty with Octo-mom. All the better that the seller says this one's mechanism has been rebuilt, although he doesn't mention if it's been repainted too.

Inside it's got a Momo wheel to grip, and even the dome light works, so sayeth the seller. Outside, he touts the 916 bumpers and tinted windows all the way around, plus, what he says are VW Spider wheels, but look like old Toyota Celica rims to me.

He goes on to say more about the car, but in a fashion that makes you wonder if he sniffed a little too much of the glue that was used to hold down the new carpet. The transmission is claimed to be redone and painted, whatever the hell that means, and in a warning to lookiloos and those who expect driving this car to be equitable to a ride in R Kelly's limo, he implores you to Please be serious if you are interested and to Keep in mind this is a REAL NO FRILL AIR COOLED SPORTS CAR. He also says that the car is Hot, Black, Maroon and Chrome, which sounds to me like a legal firm fro a Tarantino flick.


So, if you can be serious if interested, and hate the frill, what do you think about $3,295 to join the ranks of Porsche owners? Is that a price that would make you pair up its brand with your own? Or, does that make you cold, blah, morose. . . and chrome?

You decide!


Providence Craigslist or go here if the ad disappears. H/T to tep47 for the hookup!

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Fred Smith

my 1974 2.0 was only $2,000. crack pipe.