At $6,000, Should This “Fast As Hell” 1986 Olds Custom Cruiser Sell Hella Fast?

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The seller of today’s Nice Price or Crack Pipe Olds wagon describes it as “fast as hell” and a sleeper owing to its appearance and hot-ass 442 under its expansive hood. Let’s see if that combo, and its price, are worth staying up for.

Many of you lamented the fact that yesterday’s rat and roll 1978 280Z was a 2+2. That’s a shame, and is just the latest in the family man (or woman) Z’s history. You may very well have recalled that Jim Carey drove a 2+2 in the movie Bruce Almighty, which he unceremoniously dumped for a Saleen S7 upon getting his godly powers. He also made Jennifer Aniston’s already ample boobs bigger so you can see the dude’s priorities were totally whacked.

Despite the diss, yesterday’s Z was seen as buy-worthy at its discount bin price, and it carried the day with a 68% Nice Price win to get the week started off with a bang. Now let’s talk about another sort of diss.

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Back in the day Oldsmobile attempted a brand turnaround that was centered on crapping on its former customers. The “Not Your Father’s Oldsmobile” campaign not only denigrated the decision making faculties of the company’s former loyal patrons, it also cast dispersions on the fathers of those they desperately sought as new customers. It’s no wonder that Olds is no more.

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This 1986 Olds Custom Cruiser may in fact have been somebody’s father’s Oldsmobile, but more to the point, it now could possibly be yours, or the property of someone very much like you.

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Why would you—or your Single White Female-like doppelgänger want such a beast? Well, who wouldn’t want something with a claimed 480-horsepower under its hood and a rear-facing third row in back? That’s a fresh combo.

The ad claims the engine—a 7.5-litre W30 late of a 1972 Cutlass 442—to be a recent rebuild and includes some beauty shots of it out of the car. The seller details the upgraded parts that went into that build in the ad and then notes that the car’s original 140-horse 307 comes with the car too, if you want.

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That’s sort of like saying here’s a delicious crab louie, oh and the shell too in case you want something to crack a tooth on later. A TH2004R backs up the now resident big block.

That hot engine seems to be the high point of the car. The rest of it comes across as little more than midwestern meth lab chic. Not that that’s a bad thing.

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There appears to be no A/C nor heat in the car, and while the bodywork looks straight and surprisingly intact, it does show every one of its claimed 70,000 miles in the paint and degenerating plastic trim.

These big B-body cars have acres of room inside, and this one, with it’s third row seat, is a true eight-seater. You might want to have some of those eight bring a dustpan and some Febreze, since it looks a bit like a movie theatre after a matinee in there. There’s nothing really wrong with that either, it just looks kind of grungy.

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The seller calls the car a sleeper, and maybe it is with the rear window rolled down. He also claims that it comes with a mix tape that will sweep you off of your feet should that be a swaying inducement. All that is going for $6,000, or some form of MG if that’s your preferred mechanism of fiduciary exchange.

We like to stay liquid and hence we’ll stick with the cash. With that in mind, what’s your take on this hot rod Olds and that $6,000 price? Does that mean the sleeper awakens? Or, is that too much to bother getting out of bed over?

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You decide!

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Salina KS Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.

H/T to Cullen for the hookup!

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