If you’re looking to mix up both your image and your car, today is like Purim and Arbor Day all rolled up in one, because you can buy this remarkable six-wheeled, three-axled 2013 Smart ForTwo on eBay for just under 20 grand. Your new life begins now.
Just look at this thing: it’s a pretty normal last-gen Smart, albeit with a bit of overkill lighting up front, until you take the very short trip to the back. There, possibly using some DNA implanted from its 6x6 G-Wagen sibling, we find the mutations that make this bonkers lemon-drop so special: a pair of rear axles, an extra two wheels, and a little truck bed lined in diamond-pattern no-skid plate.
Oh, and there’s a spoiler back there, too, just to be sure it’s not marred by any sanity, since an unobstructed way to put things in that little truck bed would be too convenient.
You want a car that says something about you? Done. Roll up to the most exclusive club in town in this thing, and you can guarantee everyone will be thinking, “Woah. What the fuck?”
That’s exactly what you want. With this car, you’re the wildcard, the person no one knows what to expect of. Could you be dangerous? Probably. Are you exciting, fun? We think so? You’ll be blasting 2000 watts of raw confusion everywhere you go.
This car is the automotive equivalent of meeting someone for the first time, and as you shake their hand you pull them close, sliding a live mackerel into their pants as you whisper in their ear “All of us mitigate the sphere. ALWAYS!”
Then you look deeply into their eyes, Cut off a lock of their hair, and activate your rocket boots.
It doesn’t seem like there’ve been any engine upgrades, so you’re dragging that extra axle around with just that 70 HP three-pot underneath the truck bed. But that’s really all the horsepower a loon like you should legally have, anyway.
The car seems to have been built by a company called TNT Promotional Vehicles, and this “Smartruck” looks to be their big thing.
They’ve built more than one of these. Just let that sink in a moment.
For $20 grand, this is a way, way better investment than some loaded Camry or whatever. Any car can get you around; this one will take you through the flaming gates of madness, never to return.
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