Special effects nowadays are pretty wild. Whole planets can be created with fantastical creatures and blue people, but only the truly crazy among us believe that it's so real it's real. And then there was the 1980s.

Computers had just recently became a Thing, and with them sometimes came an entire detachment from reality. People elected Reagan twice, Jalopnik was a little-read zine sold in an alleyway off Elizabeth Street, and one young man who went by the name of Kevin Flynn was actually sucked into his computer, never to be seen again until he started hanging out with Olivia Wilde. The 1980s were weird.

Luckily, the people of 1980s Japan had special effects maestro John Dykstra to reassure them of their own existence, and he came in the form of a Nissan Skyline ad. Dykstra had just come off the production of Star Wars, so he knew what he was talking about.

John was asked by Nissan to make an ad for the new Skyline, so he opened up his Book of Worlds because he's a goddamn wizard. (Seriously, he says he found his strange blocky planet in his "Special Effects Atlas.) This planet not only looks exactly like a 1980s version of Mars, but also has unusual inhabitants, which look exactly like a piece of tuna sushi, because I suppose that's what aliens are in Japan. He calls them "space fish," though, so it's totally different.

I hope you'll agree that our film is extraordinary. But remember, it's all fantasy. Only the very extraordinary new Skyline is real.

Well thank God for that. Strange planets? Space sushi fish? New Skyline? John Dykstra??? I was about to have a psychotic break for a second.

Cue the flying pieces of sushi and a screaming lady.

Like I said, the 1980s were weird.