There's more to life than a Corvette. Jalopnik readers know ten unexpected, awesome midlife crisis cars.
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Now we have nothing against a Corvette. They have more performance per dollar than maybe any other car in the world, especially if you have room in your budget for new tires and suspension. The ‘Vette is going to look great, too, and it’ll match your bald spot perfectly.
There are other cars that might be fine, but just are a little bit too high performance for the average midlife crisis buyer. The GT-R springs to mind as something that will just get you into a high-speed rendezvous with a tree, though Corvettes really aren’t much better.
Did we forget any other of your dream cars that you’ll only afford when you’re older? Let us know in Kinja below.
Photo Credit: Tom Hiltz
10.) Lotus Elise
9.) BMW M5
There’s no question that an M5 is as close as you’ll get to a perfect, practical sports sedan, you just have to pick which generation fits your pocketbook. We have a thing for the E39, but anything from an E28 to an F10 will not let you down.
Suggested By: wisc47, Photo Credit: Otis Blank
8.) Alfa Romeo GTV
You can afford a Bertone-styled, rear-wheel-drive classic Italian coupe and you probably didn’t even realize it. A 1960s or 1970s Alfa GTV is probably the most handsome car you can get for the money, and maybe the best-sounding as well.
Suggested By: Brian, The Life of, Photo Credit: FurLined
7.) Mercedes E63 AMG Wagon
You can’t get an Audi RS6 Avant in the US, but you can get the slightly more adult-looking Mercedes E63 AMG longroof. While it gives most people the impression that you’re a mature person, the E63 is a hilariously immature car, ready to light up the rears on command.
Suggested By: kargO, Photo Credit: Mercedes-Benz
6.) 1960s Pickup
Don’t want to look like you’re trying too hard? Restore a ‘60s American pickup. These things can be set up for offroading, cruising, or trackdays if you have a screw loose.
Suggested By: McPherson, Photo Credit: Matt Long
5.) Morgan Three-Wheeler
You see, a mid life crisis is really just a mid life opportunity! You don’t need anything with more than two seats, and you don’t even need anything with all four wheels. Get down to three and suddenly you have a car that turns more heads than a Lamborghini and does easier burnouts than a ’68 Super Bee on space savers.
Suggested By: 6cyl, Photo Credit: Raphael Orlove
4.) One You Build Yourself
CobraJoe explains why the best car you can buy is one you make yourself, or with your family.
There is no better feeling than driving around in a vehicle that you built with your own two hands. However, if you're worried that you don't have the design or engineering or time or welding skills to start from scratch, there are a ton of kit cars out there to simplify the process. I've always wanted a kit Cobra (I couldn't afford a real one and I'd probably be afraid to drive it if I did), but there is a kit out there for nearly every car taste.
3.) ’69-’70 Mustangs
A ’68 Bullitt replica may be out of your scope, but a well-maintained 1969-70 Mustang should be reasonably affordable, look just as good, and go like hell. If there’s a ‘60s American performance car to buy, this is the one.
Suggested By: For Sweden, Photo Credit: Arnfinn Hushovd
2.) Citroen DS
Sports cars are wonderful, but there’s only one car that will make highway driving feel like riding on the butt of an angel and make you look like you won the Nobel Prize for architecture: the Citroen DS. It’s the classiest car you can buy, now that you have enough dough to get acquainted with your local French car mechanic.
Suggested By: smackela, Photo Credit: Denis De Mesmaeker
1.) A Cheap-Ass Race Car
A race car is the best performance buy you can make, and it doesn’t have to be cripplingly expensive. Caswell himself got started for just $500, though you’ll be in a few grand before you ever see a track. If it were our money, we’d go rallying, like Caswell did.
Suggested By: Bill Caswell, Photo Credit: Richard Fahey