Like with all successful crimes, you need some brains to get a car theft done. If you're trying to steal one of the ten following automobiles, you must be an idiot.
10.) Nissan Leaf
You will need speed and range to get away, and those are not the main selling points when it comes to the Nissan Leaf.
9.) Reliant Robin
You won't get far, but will see the road from a new perspective.
8.) Stanced Miata
The answer might always be Miata, but a more accurate one is stanced Miata. It's fast until you meet a pothole.
7.) Peugeot 504 diesel wagon
People steal cars to sell them as they are, or to strip them for parts. What you don't want to do is hold onto a stolen car. With a car as wonderful as a Peugeot 504 wagon, you'll inevitably fall in love, keep it, and get busted.
The 'steal it you gotta keep it' was more of a joke line between myself and my buddy who owned the other one in that photo. I actually loved my wagon...$800, drove it as the household truckster/storm car/crap weather car for 7 years. Gave it to my buddy when his died...he drove it several more years. The best...BEST...seats my backside has ever experienced. In anything. If I could find another one...
6.) Ford Model T
You need special skills for this one, says Pitchblende:
Model T Ford, sure you probably don't need to hotwire it, but first you have to learn which control does what and even then you can't outrun the cops unless they are the Keystone Cops. Plus you can't really repaint it and sell it on, claiming it is only similar to the one all the forums are saying was stolen.
5.) Shelby Daytona Coupe
Stealing extraordinarily rare and valuable cars like the Glickenhaus P4/5 or one of the only six Shelby Daytona Coupes ever built is extremely stupid. Unless you have a private track and can hide it forever.
4.) HHR SS From The Future
It's quite expensive, extremely rare, extremely attention grabbing, probably won't clear a speed bump, has the driving dynamics of an HHR SS, and ugly enough that you probably won't find a black market buyer.
So, you'd end up with something hard to run away with, easy to get caught with, not fun to drive, and not easy to sell.
Suggested By: CobraJoe , Photo Credit: Ebay
3.) An Online Writer's Car
Don't steal from someone with a huge online audience, because they can use the Internet to hunt down car stealing bastards. It works.
Suggested By: 2 wheels awesome!, Photo Credit: Jalopnik
2.) Police Car
If stealing from the Internet is bad, stealing from the cops is worse. They have the Internet and guns.
1.) Google Car
While I strongly believe that Elon Musk has a remote control that can turn any Model S into an airtight prison cell in case of a theft, Google cars admittedly have remote control.
Can't wait for Apple to come out with the finger scanner equipped version.
Welcome back to Answers of the Day - our daily Jalopnik feature where we take the best ten responses from the previous day's Question of the Day and shine it up to show off. It's by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers. Enjoy!
Top Photo Credit: Ebay