Since last year's endless parade of automobile recalls appears headed full steam ahead into 2015, let's kick off the new year with a recall that comes way out left field: Suzuki is recalling nearly 61,000 Kizashi sedans due to a transmission defect.

This may come as a shock to many of you, considering Suzuki's U.S. car division was killed off back in 2012. But not even death can stop the force of the modern recall tidal wave. Or something like that.

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The company, or what's left of it, is recalling 60,823 copies of the not bad at all Kizashi made between 2009 and 2012 with an automatic transmission. They say the shifter on those cars could slide out of park without the brake pedal being pressed, potentially causing them to roll away. (It took them until three years after the car was discontinued to figure out that it could roll away?)

I imagine the recall went down at Suzuki Motor of America, Inc. something like this:

Suzuki America Employee 1: Man, I just rode to work on the new Hayabusa 50th Anniversary Edition. SO GOOD.

Suzuki America Employee 2: We got a problem. Turns out the Kizaski rolls away.

Suzuki America Employee 1: The what?

Suzuki America Employee 2: The Kizashi! The car. The car we used to make.

Suzuki America Employee 1: (Thinks for a minute) Ohhhh yeaaaah. That one. It rolls away?

Suzuki America Employee 2: Yeah.

Suzuki America Employee 1: Aw, fuck. We gonna recall it?

Suzuki America Employee 2: ...I guess so?

Suzuki America Employee 1: Better than getting sued, probably.

Suzuki America Employee 2: I haven't even driven a car in years.

As with every recall, when you get your notice in the mail you should take your Kizashi to your local dealership for a free repair. But since Suzuki dealerships aren't exactly in plentiful supply these days, find a service center with this link or call customer service at 1-714-996-7040.

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The Kizashi is getting recalled. Man. Never would have guessed that would be a thing when I woke up this morning.