This is The Morning Shift, our one-stop daily roundup of all the auto news that's actually important — all in one place at 9:00 AM. Or, you could spend all day waiting for other sites to parse it out to you one story at a time. Isn't your time more important?

We just got this from the Netherlands, where a pedestrian island outsmarted a pizza delivery man. Still, better than getting cold pizza!

Believe it or not, there are a whole lot of smart owners here in North America. Possibly even more unbelievable are our yearly events taking place in various locations all over.

One of the two greatest questions anyone will ask (or rather just assume) about the smart fortwo is, "Is it safe?"

Can you buy a car in 140 characters or fewer? I mean, the last time I bought a new car, it took weeks, if not months, to decide on a car and a color and then about four hours to drive and sit down with a grinning salesman before a deal was struck. It wasn't like I could just see a tweet and click.

Electric cars are really still in their infancy. And, like infants, they've been really terrible about picking coherent standards to do things as a collaborative whole. Put any group of babies together and ask them to establish norms for, say, a standard unit of density, and what do they do? Wet themselves and shove…

Don't give your change to that homeless man! Take back the five bucks you gave to that orphanage! There's a team trying to enter a Smart car into the grueling Dakar Rally and they need your money.

This photo of a Broward County Sheriff's Department Smart police car comes courtesy of a Floridian, who notes in his email "we set ourselves up for this one." Indeed you did. A Smart car to catch dumb criminals. Maybe less ironic and just more appropriate.

The Smart brand made news this week when they smartly outmaneuvered a blogger on Twitter when he suggested the crap of a single bird could destroy one of the cars. Not so, they said. It would take 4.5 million pigeon poops to destroy a Smart.

Every automaker is bound to respond differently to an insulting comment lobbed at one of its cars: ignore it; lash out angrily; or just go along with what was said and try to make it funny.