Do you know how many observable holidays there are in America today, January 5? Three: Twelfth Night (the 12th night of Christmas or something), National Bird Day, and National Whipped Cream Day. Do any of these seem important? Don’t cars deserve at least as much recognition as birds, whipped cream, and whatever this “Christ-mas” holiday is? Of course they do.

Advertisement

That’s why I think it’s time for an automotive-related holiday. Something more than October 2nd (the shared birthday of both Gandhi and my sister), which is National Name Your Car Day. I’m thinking of something that celebrates and recognizes the role of cars in our culture and society, and something with enough weight behind it so we can get a day off work.

I was thinking Nicolas-Joseph Cugnot’s birthday might be a good date for the holiday, since Cugnot’s lumbering steam-powered steam drag is the best candidate for the First Car. His birthday is February 26, which is nice and close, but it’s also sort of cold in many places.

Advertisement

Maybe something more springtime or summery would be better since, for most of us, automotive enjoyment happens outside. Maybe we could tie it in to a noted religious figure, like Catherine of Alexandria (patron saint of mechanics) or maybe St. Christopher (patron saint of travelers) or someone like that, to, you know, piggyback on a group that really knows from holidays.

The day would be spent with friends, loved ones, and your cars. You’d take advantage of the day to do some needed maintenance or start a big project. Maybe racetracks would have special open National Car Day events, where everyone could get a quick go at track driving. I’m also thinking lots of grilled meats and getting drunk (when you’re done driving, of course, Gawker lawyers) will be involved.

So what do you kooks think? When should we have the holiday? What should we do? Any special foods, or ceremonial headgear? Will your boss give you the day off? I hope so, because I’m planning on making a bunch of gyros and putting on some heat exchangers on the Beetle, and I need your help.