Photo courtesy Ocala Police

Okay, quick quiz: you stop at a stoplight when a screaming weirdo punches you through your car window, then threatens you and your family with a gun. What do you do? If you’re Zach Waring, you just drive over the guy’s car in your lifted F-150. There. Problem solved.

As is to be expected, all of this went down in Florida; Ocala, to be specific. Waring, 18, was driving with his girlfriend and an 11-month old child when they noticed a Toyota Camry, driven by 53 year-old Adalberto Aponte, driving recklessly behind them.

Bay News 9 reports that Waring told police Aponte had almost caused several wrecks, and when Waring stopped at a red light, Aponte exited the Camry and approached the open window of Waring’s truck.

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The police report states that Aponte “began to strike him [Waring] in the face through the window multiple times,” at which point Waring’s girlfriend yelled to Aponte that there was a gun in the truck, in an effort to scare Aponte away.

Unfortunately, the ruse backfired, as the police report says Aponte responded “I’ll show you a real gun.” Aponte then began to return to his vehicle to, presumably, obtain the ‘real gun.’

Waring, unable to drive forward due to the red light and the cross-traffic, hatched his cunning plan: keep the guy from getting the gun from his car by driving over the fucking thing.

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Waring put his truck in reverse, and neatly parked it right on top of the Camry, like a big, 4x4 chicken keeping an egg warm.

Witnesses corroborated Waring’s story, and Aponte was arrested for a surprising litany of charges, including burglary, battery, and driving with suspended license for failing to pay child support in September 2016. Couldn’t have happened to a better person, right?

I guess I should mention that we cannot condone driving over anyone’s car. What led to the escalation isn’t clear, also, though witnesses do seem to side with Waring’s description of events. Also, it’s a terrible idea to say you have a gun in these contexts, whether you do or not. There’s lots of wrong to be slathered over everyone and everything here.

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Look, it’s always a terrible idea to threaten someone with a gun. It’s an especially terrible idea to threaten someone with a gun when they’re driving something that can roll over your boring-ass Camry like a speed bump.