For today’s Nice Price or Crack Pipe contest we have a Mitsu… I mean a Chrys… um, Dodge… er, Plymouth…? Oh hell, they sold these things under too many names. We’ll still have to decide if the seller of this one has named a good price.


If you piss off a friend and they take out their anger towards you by beating the shit out of your car, that shows poor judgment on both your parts. You should be ashamed for your poor choice of friends, and they should feel bad about their indirect parry to your initial transgression.

There were no bad choices to be had when it came to last Friday’s beat up 1985 Chevy Camaro, there was just too much pissed-off girlfriend inflicted damage there to warrant its asking, and that cracked-up Z-28 went down in an 85% Crack Pipe loss. Speaking of Warrant, I’ll bet there’s one of that band’s CDs in that Chevy.


While GM was cranking out F-bodies like that Camaro, and Ford was fine-tuning the Fox-bodied Mustang to fight them for yet another year, the third member of the Big Three, Chrysler, was addressing their need for RWD hot shoe, lead foot fare not with domestic bliss, but with cars imported from Japan.

By the late ‘80s Chrysler had pretty much fully embraced the transverse engine/front-wheel drive layout for most all of what they built, and the company really didn’t have a domestic platform to compete with the Camaros, Mustangs, and Firebirds. Fortunately they had friends with benefits in Japan, and they leveraged Mitsubishi for a ton of lightly rebranded iron.

This 1988 Chrysler Conquest is so light in the rebranding department that even the seller can’t make up his mind whether it’s a Chrysler Conquest ESI or a Starion ESI. To make matters even more confusing, Chrysler eventually also sold the Conquest as both Dodge and Plymouth products as well, because why the hell not!

Whatever it is, it looks to be in pretty nice shape, and believe you-me, you don’t find too many of these this nice any more. It apparently has taken some work to keep it in shape over the long haul. There’s a respray in the car’s past, and that is starting to get funky according to the ad. You can see that the front air dam has had an unfortunate brush with an immovable object, and needs to be re-glassed or replaced.



Other than that this 138,000-miler seems okay on the outside, rust-free, and the desirable wide body edition too boot. It even has its factory five-spoke alloy wheels which is an impressive feat considering how easy a change those can be.

On the inside, this car is like a time machine. No, I don’t mean its a popular but fanciful trope of science fiction, but so clean and seeming unmolested that sitting in it you’ll think you’ve been transported back to the Reagan era. And you’ll really feel it as the mechanized mouse belts close around your neck. There’s a Momo steering wheel and a fancy shift knob in here too, along with a Kenwood stereo, so you won’t feel too out of time.


Mechanically, the car has apparently also gone through the change of life. The ad notes that the 2.6-litre 145-bhp hemi-head four has been ‘professionally rebuilt’ with a slew of usual suspect parts replaced, and notably the balance shafts removed.

It now also has a non-jet head which is a good thing, but if your state requires a stringent visual inspection for emissions testing, it likely won’t pass. Most states don’t seem to give a damn about cars this old, so check it out before you buy. Caveat Emptor and all that. A five-speed stick backs up the turbo’d Astron.

The price tag for this survivor Starion is $5,200, and it’s now time to vote on whether that seems like a good deal or not. For people who really always wanted one if these, it’s looking like the window’s closing on the opportunity to get down with a good one. Is this one good enough to plunk down $5,200? Or, is this a deal in name only?


You decide!

Portland OR Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.



H/T to Eric Sansom for the hookup!

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