Today’s Nice Price or Crack Pipe 633CSI presently lives in San Luis Obispo, or as the locals like to call it, SLO. Let’s see if this stick shift coupe’s price ensures its sale is anything but slow.

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An Audi without Quattro is like the Coyote without the Roadrunner, Kanye without Autotune, or the Denver Broncos without their defense. That at least, is the impression yesterday’s FWD-only 1986 Audi Coupe GT must have presented—perhaps muffled under its coat of plastidip—as it fell on the wrong side of a narrow 53% Crack Pipe loss.

Oh well, if you didn’t like that two-wheel drive German sport coupe from the Eighties at nearly six grand, let’s see how you like today’s two-wheel drive German sport coupe from the Eighties at less than half that cost.

Here we have a 1983 BMW 633CSI “Dinan.” What exactly is “Dinan” on the car? Who the hell knows? The ad doesn’t specify. Perhaps the present owner likes to drive around in it going dinan-dinan-dinan-dinan-dinan-dinan-dinan-dinan-dinan-dinan, BATMAN! Or, maybe it’s the very orange cross brace between the front strut towers that gains the car the additional tuner cachet.

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As we’re all no doubt aware, BMW’s shark-nosed coupe was really two cars under the skin over the course of its life. The ’76 though ’82 cars were based on the older E12 5-series platform, while the later, visually almost identical cars shared underpants with the more modern E28 5-series sedan.

This one is one of the later, E28-based beasts and it rocks an M30B32 SOHC straight six which was imbued at the factory with 181-bhp. A Getrag five-speed manual properly backs that up and likely gives the big coupe the best theft protection money can buy.

This Cirrus (Baltic?) blue over blue leather E24 is claimed to be a daily driver, and capable of making runs between San Francisco and Los Angeles without complaint. According to the ad, recently replaced ignition system consumables and new fluids are apparently insurance to keep it that way.

You get a fairly clean body and hair-shirt 17-inch wheels on the outside, while inside you’re presented with sport seats, a panel with extra gauges in the dash, and a steering wheel apparently stolen from an arcade machine. Yeah, that’d be about the first thing to go here.

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What’s not to like? Well, the odometer says 140K but the seller says it’s a dirty liar and the actual mileage is somewhere in the range of 170K to 180K—remember all those trips between SF and LA. There’s also a non-working rear window, which is thankfully stuck in the full-up position. And then there’s this sentence in the ad: “…& driver door installed wich i have.” I don’t know what that means as I’m just not up on all the emoji that the kids use to snap their chats and pin their tresses these days.

On the plus side, it’s a classic BMW 6-series that seems to be running and not clapped out, and comes with a clean title. It doesn’t seem to have any modifications that couldn’t be easily rectified, and, if you can’t afford that dominatrix you’ve been pining after you can offer to low-ball the seller as he claims that low ballers will “be ridiculed then ignored.” Oh baby!

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Or, you could just offer him the $2,500 he’s asking for the car. Do you think that would be a deal? Or, is this a 633CSI that’s priced for a slow go?

You decide!

San Luis Obispo Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.

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