They're all so great it hard to decide! May I have one of each?

How about Boss Hogg's Eldo?

Pffft. Blackhawk. Diplomaticas are what Saudi Arabians drive.

Is that the turn signal of a super beetle???

My grandpa has a golden spirit, pretty sweet car.

@Daga: Thanks for reminding me, I know what all of these cars are missing. Bullhorns.

They build these in Syracuse (Genesse St.), apparently, I'll have to get some pictures for your grotesque viewing pleasure when I go back to school. Love how the gas cap feeds straight into the "canvas" trunk. Real Recaro seats! That golden eagle on the front is crooked, possibly from goring hapless peasantry Death Race/Carmageddon style.

Then again, what'd you expect from the woman who lived in Sinatra's house? Next to Liberace?

How about half of the IMSA field from that era?

Probably the Stutz Blackhawk in the early 80s, but if they were sucessful at it they would have definitely had a Zimmer Quicksilver by the mid-80s: [www.zimmermotorcars.com]

The museum that this car is in is about 2 blocks from my folks house in San Diego. I didn't get a chance to go the last time I was down there, but I will visit in December. They have a pretty nice collection.

Not one, not two, but THREE spare tire wells! I wonder how many of them are actually holding a spare tire.

The VIN indicates it was born a Ford Mustang.

Whenever I see cars like this I wonder why they go to the expense of completely replacing all the body work but don't bother to reskin the damned doors?

Also, I thought all coke dealers drove Contaches and 928s?

@dylanseals: That is a Super Beetle turn signal. Wow, spare no expense!

All of the cars mentioned in this post/comment string shouldn't be sniffed at lightly.

Building 'em in Syracuse? Does that mean they come pre-rusted from the Salt City? (Full disclosure: I lived in Manlius for 5 years a few decades back)

I voted for the Diplomatica in a fit of delight. I had no idea they made of those. I'd like one to go with my Aston Martin Lagonda.

But, actually, the Stutz Blackhawk is the best one. It's like a very exclusive Eldorado, which is another good coke dealer car. Robert Goulet owned one. The Zimmers and Excaliburs are typically used as wedding cars now.

My guess is that only the rear spare tire cover is functional. The ones on the sides have not cutlines for them to open on. Purely decorative.

Even though I voted for the Excalibur, my heart goes with the Porsche 928. Tint the windows and put in a scanner that'll pick up UFOs.

Say hello to my little friend.

I vote the DeLorean, sans flux capacitor

Oy. Where to begin? The Lincoln Mk IV interior, the "Dearborn Unplugged" drivetrain, the screwed-on surface-mount directionals? The obvious Wolfsburg origin of said lights?

According to the eBay copy, Zimmer found the build quality of the original Excalibur "lacking." Looking at this, I'd hate to see what "lacking" looks like.

If big SUVs are penis compensation vehicles (PCVs), then what is this compensating for? I'm guessing frontal lobes.

Growing up, my family used to summer in Door County, WI. There was this white Excalibur that I used to see all the time. I've also had run-ins with Stutzes and Amantis up there.

Excalibur for the win! It's the cheesewagon extraordinaire!

This was the choice car for the coke buff (not to be confused with the coke dealer)and/or successful Amway business owner, these were quality people!

They were the newly rich, who lived by the credo "Wealth Makes Taste".

@jnostalgics: Yeah how the did actual car of choice for early 80s coke dealers not make the list?

Real careers of these drivers:
Stutz Whatever: Successful north Jersey bleach factory owner
Zimmer Golden Spirit: Retired north Jersey paving contractor living at Tahoe.
Excalibur: Extravagantly gay Reno casino lounge act, parks it in front of a house worth as much as the car, rents.

If you need any more help with 80s culture, I'll be over here clipping the hair out of my ears.

We know all of these cars are amazing -- but, what I find much more better are the accompanying write ups where the people selling 'em actually seem to believe that the cars are luxurious, desirable and, well, good.

Just brilliant stuff. America, indeed.

@Fly I-80: Cheers on linking Jersey to Tahoe and Reno. Very adept stuff.

@jonnylieberman: I speak from tragic firsthand experience, but thank you, sir.