Jalopnik
After a pair of close ones, we finally had a decisive victory in our last Choose Your Eternity poll, with the Taurus SHO using its Yamaha power to roar to victory over the SRT-Faux by a 70/30 margin. We're not surprised by that, but we don't have the foggiest idea who should be considered the favorite in today's matchup. Either choice would be serious fun with all the bugs worked out... but such big, crawly bugs!
Today we're going old school with the source for a PCH ad; I dropped by Alameda's Lee Auto Supply (the last independent auto-parts store in the area and sponsors of the Park Street Car Show) and taped to the counter was this flyer for a '77 Lotus Eclat. The Eclat was essentially a fastback Elite, with all the pluses and minuses of the breed. You know it'll stick to the road... if it can reach the road, that is! This one is only $6500, and the seller claims it runs. Formerly owned by a "retired head mechanic for Lotus Racing," this car has upgraded cams, a Toyota transmission, and a Nardi steering wheel. The seller can't keep this fine machine, however, because "I have no garage, only a gravel-covered levee, which makes tinkering a challenge." Tinkering... is that what you call the kind of work that involves several hundred Lotus parts scattered all about the premises, with gobbets of raw knuckle-beef dangling from your hands and your wallet feeling distinctly light? Yes, that's what we call it, too!
We love package deals, with the Instant Junkyard appeal and all that, and you'd certainly have to be thankful for some parts cars if you were to take on a Bianchi project. Our friend and microcar guru Jonee spotted this ad for three 1959 Bianchi minicars (go here if the ad disappears), and how could anyone resist these cars? Unfortunately, oxygen atoms were unable to resist getting together with the iron atoms in these cars' floorboards, and the seller speaks ominously of "other metal body work" as well. They've got 500cc air-cooled engines that haven't been started in years... but look at the bright side: when you get tired of replacing rusty sheet metal, you can rebuild three engines! And you don't have to worry that money spent on this project will be wasted, because last year one of these babies went for a stunning $39,599 at auction in Monterey. It's an investment!
Comments
Has to be the Eclat all the way, Norfolk's finest example of wedgy mould / rust fusion.
A synonym of PCH is Lotus: Lots of trouble, usually serious.
Éclat it is.
I went with the three Bianchis.
A rational approach to the Lotus could include rounding out the Toyota tranny with a Toyota motor. Think about it: A Lotus that would have some hope of starting - and running - on a cold, wet morning.
No, true PCH requires starting with three cars - and still needing lots of parts. And a good welder.
Personally, a Bianchi EV conversion seems like the way to go here...
What the hell am I gonna do with three Bianchis? Three admittedly cute hat-shaped Italian toys.
Actually, I love them.
But I love the Lotus a little bit more. I love the engine, I love the heavily reclined seating position, I love the pop up- or pop one up, or possibly pop one slightly up with a following wind, if you roll a six to strart- headlamps. And possibly the best shape of the 70s+ Loti, wedge me up
Hell is the Lotus Position for the rest of my life.
I was tempted to vote for the Lotus because 1) It's from a bulletin-board flyer, which is were all unbelievably lucky deals come from, and, 2) It's a Lotus.
But those ultra-rare Bianchis are too cartoon-teddy-bear cute to be hell, right?; They couldn't possibly be Beryllium Sphere Minors. I'm getting all warm and fuzzy. I could totally see one hotrodded with a CBR600 motor and painted Bianchi bicycle green. Ciao!
Hell, or "three-times-hell?" I'm going with 3xHell until we can get Hell^2. Which would be two Eclats.
@Rust-MyEnemy: You have been a roll for a number of days now. Just what are you drinking on the Essex Riviera? I want some.
3 little B'anchis,
2 KITT 'Stangs,
and
a street-legal Koenig.
Oh, the cars. I do not want the Lotus position. I want the three clown cars. I'm pretty sure that as long as you're welding, you could make a three-headed monstrous deformed car with teh cute now disturbing. Nightmare fuel. The Cerberus, of course.
If you get three cars, there's the chance you could use them to get one running. The Eclat is the automotive equivalent of Bear Grylls in the Outback. Except this time, he doesn't make it out alive.
If I could get 'em running and find some old Shriners to pilot them, I could finally start my geriatric road-warrior gang. I'd lead them on a small block powered unicycle of my own design. Hell would become heaven, would become hell. We are legion.
The Lotus would have been a candidate for PCH when brand new.
Voted for the Lotus. I actually would like to own that Lotus. The Bianchis could only be fun if you finished all three and converted them to RC.
@Novaload: Well, thank you very much.
Today it has been mainly Sauvignon Cabernet and Jack Daniels.
You've been doing pretty well yourself, mate.
Group hug!
The Eclat, especially as though I've been through the first few turns of that journey before...sadly it would have been an economic 'mare. Good luck getting those rims to shine too!
Three Bianchis! 1. Ford 390 FE worked to a 427. 2. Chevy 503 crate motor. 3. Hemi-goodness. Bodywork? Paint? Interior? Nahhhh.
I'll always vote for the multi-car option.
There's gotta be 1 good car worth of parts in there, right?
...right?
I'd rather combine last week's and this week's and nominate a Lotus Esprit with SHO motor that lived here in San Diego for awhile. I walked back 3 miles from a test drive in that car. As we trudged along, the seller optimistically asked, "This isn't going to affect your buying the car is it?"
Since I already have had 5 Lotuses, and have NEVER seen an Eclat worth a crap, I'll take the Bianchis
The Lotus Doorstop was my choice, the description made me wonder what other Toyota goodies could be stuff in there, that plus with the alternative you'd probably fair better with three Bianchi bicycles.
This is a tough call. On any other day, the Lotus would be a no-brainer. Today, I voted for the Bianchis. The Shriner parade from hell was also my first thought when seeing this trio-o-trouble.
The real joy is knowing that if you can actually merge all three cars into one, you're still going to be hopelessly shy of parts, metal and the like, plus knowing that most people on a two-wheeled Bianchi can outrun one of these things.
There's almost nothing electrical in the Bianchis, besides, when Italian cars act up, you can just park them for awhile and they'll probably start when you get back.
When something breaks in a Lotus, it requires a third mortgage on your house to fix (the second mortgage is for the biannual tune ups they seem to require).
On the one hand, any car called Eclat (which means many things in French, including "scandal" and "embarassment") has three strikes against it before you turn the ignition. At least it's an honest moniker: restoring the body work and electrics to original spec will be a full-blown nightmare. And even then, the electrics will be crap.
On the other, you could go for the Italian rustbuckets, rip out the rear seats and build the only car ever with three engines: the Bianchi Dante. RWD, too! Ok, so they're only 500cc but between yoking the cranskshafts together with a custom-designed gear box, the additional air cooling and, the transmission and suspension upgrades required you could be tearing your hair out for a long, long time. And avoiding bill collectors.
This is a tough call, but in the end three is more than one.
Ha! I saw those Bianchis long ago while surfing 'round craigslist here in Phoenix. As awesome as having a Lotus would be, having three race-ready Bianchis to hoon around cone-courses in the big empty parking lot behind the Harkins at Gateway would be tops.
The security there only have bicycles and the police take approximately 13 minutes to arrive on average, so I really should be making a call to my credit card company today.
3 Bianchis do not make an Eclat.
It's "Bianchina"
@citromike: Ha! Well, did it?
No way in Hell I'd pass up the chance to own $118,797 worth of Bianchis for just pennies on the dollar.
@rgseidl: French is my first language. I had a look at the various on-line translations for Éclat (Collins, etc.). None of them have it completely right.
Éclat de verre = Broken glass, shard of glass
Éclater (verb) = To blow up, to burst
Éclaté (adj.) = Blown
I want to cry.
It's PCHs like this that make me feel ignorant and inadequate... I've never heard of Bianchi, and while I have heard of Lotus, I would have guessed an Eclat to be a calorie-laden French dessert. I shall lurk on the sidelines without casting an uninformed vote (I shall, of course, insert snarky and/or risqué comments as they occur to me... duh!)
@Tanshanomi: You beat me to the inevitable bike engine conclusion, but I still think it would be bitchin'.
Eclat reminds me too much of eclair. Eclairs aren't hell, they're delicious. I don't want that ruined for me.
@rgseidl: Those things even have a back seat to tear out? That is flat-out amazing.
@FLB:
é·clat /eɪˈklɑ; Fr. eɪˈkla/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[ey-klah; Fr. ey-kla] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
-noun
1. brilliance of success, reputation, etc.: the éclat of a great achievement.
2. showy or elaborate display: a performance of great éclat.
3. acclamation; acclaim.
Eh? Ok.........
So many people that don't understand what Hell means...
A (presumably) well-maintained Lotus is simply not more hellish than 3 rusty Italian minicars that haven't been started in years. I weep for your ignorance and pray for your souls.
@Rust-MyEnemy: That's exactly what I meant. It's not a complete definition of the word, far from it in fact. It has several other meanings and uses.
And in the context of a Lotus, I'm pretty sure it means 'broken piece of (fil de blanc)'
He took out the Lucas fans...so he's either partially removed the devil or royally pissed him off.
@FLB: "Broken piece of son of white...?"
Fil = Wire
Fils = Son
@FLB: Ooops... My bad! I don't get any practice on my highschool French living in L.A. In hindsight, taking Spanish would have served me better! (And my highschool French was taken 25 years ago, and the ol' memory ain't so sharp as I age...)
@Charles_Barrett: Pas grave!
@FLB: (Hazarding a guess...) "No problem..."
Once drove an Excel with great Lotus auto drop headlamps, they would slip back into the nose depending on it being a right or left hand bend. Then slowly pop back up on the straights. Happy days.
3 Bianchis +2 Chiantis +1 'Busha = Dante's Howling Hoons of Hell!
@Rust-MyEnemy:"Hell is the Lotus Position for the rest of my life". Are you STILL reading Kama Sutra in your "free time".
I will never buy a automobile where the word "cute" is in the description.Period
@Charles_Barrett: Oui!
I had to vote for the Lotus, despite a) my feet never ever fitting in Lotus pedal boxes and b) the inevitability of idiots watching you go by and yell "Hey Doc, how's the Flux Capacitor??!"
I love lotuses (loti ?) but in this case I'm gonna have to go with the 3 Bianchis:
Convert one to a camino, one to a wagon, and one to a convertible. Turbo 'busa motors all around.
The Eclat is dangerously close to being a malaise-era shooting break. How more Jalop can you get?
the bianchis are FIAT 500 running gear...
i have one word for that
Carlo ABARTH!!
the orginal hoon!!
Some models built by Fiat or its subsidiaries Lancia and Autobianchi were co-branded Abarth, the most famous being the Autobianchi A112 Abarth.
[en.wikipedia.org]