Jalopnik
With the Olds blasting the Chrysler by a decisive margin in yesterday's Choose Your Eternity poll, we figured it was time to go across the water and get a couple of seriously cool- yet sanity-shreddingly difficult- sporty cars for you to choose from today. And, just because no choices are easy in Hell, we're going to make you choose between German rotary and Detroit V8 power.
We're going to give the Project Car Understatement of the Year Award to the seller of this '76 Jensen Interceptor III, for the statement "There are some problems with the wiring." Stop the presses- a Jensen with wiring problems? But that's no big deal, not when you're talking about an Interceptor for just $3000. The seller claims the car "runs and can be drivin" (sic), but there's no mention of whether it has the original Mopar 440 or... something else. Also no big deal, since the junkyards are full of 440s, though it would be nice to know if it has a manual trans. When you're buying the last of the Interceptors for three Gs, you just have to take what you get.
The Interceptor, hellish as it may be, is something of a known quantity; buying it would be like deciding to walk from Florida to Alaska while dragging a washing machine chained to your ankle- it would be long and arduous, but you'd know how far you had to travel. However, when you buy this barn find '66 NSU Spider, you're signing up for a journey that may never end, and instead of dragging a washing machine you'll be pushing a dumpster full of boiling monkey piss. But, see, if you get it working you'll be the only non-Mazda rotary driver in your time zone! This NSU has been sitting in an Ohio barn- literally- since 1976, so every component that ever touched fluid is going to be bad, the engine is almost certainly locked solid, and there will be unexpected corrosion surprises galore. Parts obtainment... well, let's just say you'll want a machine shop handy. On the plus side, you get a bunch of NOS spare parts and the seats and carpets were stored separately and are in nice shape.
Comments
The NSU absolutely defines automotive purgatory. Dante may even have written about this particular project.
have to say interceptor for one simple reason. parts.
finding replacement parts for a 40 year old wankel is gonna doom you to true PCH
Jensen - don't know nothin' 'bout no Wanker.
I like how the NSU has less than 10,000 miles on it yet looks as if it survived Dresden.
I'm trying to figure out that first line on the Interceptor description...Do the motor, brakes, and transmission all work fine? Or the motor breaks but the transmission works fine?
For pure Hell I would have to say NSU. The nephew is talking as if the thing is in pretty good condition but the photos all show abundance of rust and dirt, and it looks very scary. I could almost smell it.
Normally I would dismiss the NSU because it's not as much hellish as it is suicidal. If a car can't ever run again, period, it's not really a fair contest. The car has to have an outside, remote, fleeting like a dream upon waking, chance of restoration. That chance, of course, is in Hell.
But, I will go for the NSU because it would be like discovering a lost civilization.
Is this a trick question? Is there something cool about the NSU that I'm unaware of? Something that's supposed to supercede a Mopar 440 and four-wheel drive and make me ignore those laser shots that seem to have hit every body panel?
Dante needs to write another chapter on a new level of the underworld that includes the NSU. The best mod for that thing is a stick of dynamite.
The Jensen is cooler, but the NSU wins because this is project car hell.
@jonnylieberman: Survived? It looks like they might have thought "Bombs! Shit! Hide the NSU in the cathedral!"
I brought the Jensen back to within 1 vote of the NSU! The Jensen has the whole shooting-brake thing going for it as well as a fugly yellow.
NSU for me. I hope someone in the Raleigh area buys it and gets it running just so I can see it on the road (or tow truck).
The NSU! Just drop a 3rd gen RX-7 motor in for reliability.
What?
I nearly spit my coke, Jensen all the way!!!
The NSU is also a convertible which means it will be much better for picking up women of questionable morals. And since you're in Hell, there'll be plenty of them around!
while both would be hell, there are layers of hell and I picked the Jensen to stay at one of the upper levels.
@B-town:
It's an ass-engined, rotary powered German convertible!
Oh geez, the NSU will be pure hell... You'd probably be best off stripping everything down and redoing the whole car. hmm... Swap a 13B in there, non-turbo, of course, and you'd have yourself one sweet car.
Actual running Jensen Interceptor - in yellow no less - versus a car doesn't motor in any fashion which could be described as "auto"? Totally go for the Jensen.
NSU. But only because I need the practice for the day when I'll really go to PCH. The Ro80 has always been a siren to me...
I want both of them.
No, I wouldn't touch either one with a 10 foot pole.
Maryann or Ginger?
Each choice seems to get more hellish than the last.
Somebody, somewhere, will probably go for each of them.
Not me. I didn't even vote.
Hmmm, that Interceptor is just a couple miles away from me. It's a good thing that I don't have a garage, because I love a challenge. :)
NSU. I would undertake an Augean mechanical and structural restoration, leaving the cosmetics untouched. This restoration would, of course, involved copious amounts of Mazda rotary goodness supplied by that devine creation, the 20B.
Upon completion, a Sisyphusian quest for Prepared class autocross glory would commence.
Then I'd die and would be cursed to do this all over again.
NSU has also been known to mean Non-Specific Urethritis. Which, interestingly, is also USN spelled backwards. I know. I been there. The USN part anyway.
The spirit of PCH seems to have lost. C'mon people, NSU all the way.
Gotta love the Jensen and all it's wiring quirks. I'd try and take the price down about a grand and pay $2k for it.
"Jensen Interceptor" has to be the coolest car name ever, especially when accompanied by the 440 burble.
In contrast, if you say "I have an NSU Wankel", many people will assume you are confessing to a bladder infection brought about by over-enthusiastic self abuse.
You actually have a shot at getting the Jensen to run. As mentioned, you could just pop into any local junkyard and get a transplant donor. Wiring, shmiring. And the paint even looks decent, from here - 500 feet away.
The NSU? Engine made from pure unobtanium. Body panels? Hahahahahahahahahaha. As if.
My choice? The NSU, natch.
The Jensen is the two-wheel-drive version at least. The 4-wheel-drive FF would be a different story.
@B-town:
the Interceptor isn't 4WD. You're thinking of the Jensen FF, which was 4WD. It had two of those vents on each side and rode a little higher.
One of my friend's dads has a beautifully restore interceptor MKIII convertible. Fantastic car.
With the price of 3-D printers coming down, you could mill your own parts for the NSU!
Interceptor in the real world, NSU in hell.
Jensen freakin interceptor, it runs, it drives, its a Jensen Interceptor what more do you want, wiring is for pansies, we don't want no freakin power windows, or things like that, if it doesn't have a manual go get one, and I imagine there is all sorts of ability to hot up that 440, and it comes down to what would you want more, a kick ass interceptor, or a nsu wankel, both are very cool, but the interceptor is just more cool, get rid of the yellow paint it dark british racing green, or dark blue, mmm the Jensen just seems so much easier, but if were to bother with the wiring, it would be hell, but maybe like the first level, virtuous pagans, but more likely the second, the wankel would require a whole umpteenbazillion levels of hell, just so it could go on the very lowest of those hells, i don't know if we're supposed to vote for what we would want, or which car is more hellish, or what car will be more rewarding in the end?, what the hell are we supposed to choose? I'm just going to pick what I which car I would rather submit myself too...
NSU is pure PCH. Hugely painful, but man, when it's done...total p*ssy magnet (but only if you paint it yellow).
Well I didn't go with my heart tonight. I want to chose the Interceptor but fell for the NSU. Why you ask? Well, because it really looks like PURE HELL. A total freakin nighmare! It looks as if Satan himself shit that car out of his ass. You WILL spend an eternity on the Spider.Thank You and Goodnight. I'm sure I'll be having a nightmare tonight.....about Spiders...
In a Tina Turner's voice from Beyond Thunderdome...
"Who's the King of Project car hell?"
Jalopo-nesto's reply...
"Jensen Interceptor is!"
You guys are weak. That NSU would be easy to get running. I choose you, NSU!
It's a rusty NSU with a Wankel that has not been seen or touched for 30 years. Restoring that piece of automotive history, on this side of the Pond, is the epitome of PCH!
There was a guy across town totally into NSUs. I counted two Prinz and a Ro80 out in front of his house. I should go by there in a couple of weeks and see if this NSU Spider is sitting there. If so, we will know where the ninth level of Hell is.
I lurve Mopars and have an almost completely treated Britcar affliction that could easily flare back up for a big-block equipped British tourer.
But mine's another vote for the NSU. The Jensen is too easy.
BTW, the combination of Clash reference and a writeup featuring Sysiphus recast with a washing machine & boiling monkey piss makes this PCH especially lovely.
@jonnylieberman: I've had a half dozen Wankel Spiders, including some worse than this and none have had over 10k miles. I had a perfect 9k mile example that was on its second engine rebuild.
As far as how I'm voting, I'm the current high bidder on the NSU Wankel and have been most of the auction.
Got to be the NSU. The Jensen doesn't look like it even has a motor from the pic; the NSU has something under the hood at least.
Had to go with the Jensen, I think I'll name my next son that, Jensen Interceptor the Third!
Gotta go with the Jensen, even if it isn't the FF
Hate to say it but I actually restored a 73 Interceptor that was rode hard and put away wet for many years. Didn't run when I got it. 6 years and I don't want to think about how much money later, I had to sell it due to financial problems. It was a wrench (literally). At least you can get parts for the Interceptor and the motor is easy to work on... that NSU looks like hell. For reals.
P.S. that's the Int in my profile picture.
@Stumies: But the Jensen is already p**sy magnet yellow - you'll be beating the women off with your fried wiring harness! Plus, it's totally good for picking up a classier group of women with questionable morals.
Yeah, even if it's a light hell, like a class reunion, I voted for the Jensen.
British cars = hell.
Plus the Interceptor is a hell of a lot better looking and rarer than the Spider.
@junkman: Oh yeah! Any insane engine swaps in mind?
Interceptor. This is exactly the kind of British nightmare I've been lusting over.
The 440/727 Torqueflite combo is pretty much bulletproof - Hello...440 six-pack anyone? I know with the rare Interceptor SP models the "SP" stands for six-pack. I smell a clone (or is that burning wiring...? I can't tell).
If I only had the $$ for it.
@junkman: You, sir, are a glutton for punishment.
This was a tough call, but I picked the Jensen because the thoughts of me driving that thing all hotted up would keep me at the task longer. Like for an eternity.
The NSU? I could see me throwing in the towel before too long. The car - even if it were totally redone - just doesn't have the oomph of the Jensen.