A chap named Harold Cue, age 52, was just going about minding his own business on Cape Cod this week when he happened to drive into Wimpy's, a local seafood joint. His excuse? He owns a $100,000 car, and therefore will do whatever he wants.
After the crash, Barnstable, Mass. police Patrolman David Downs was sent to the scene, Cape Cod Online reports:
At about 6:30 p.m. Barnstable police Patrolman David Downs was dispatched to Wimpy's Seafood Market in Osterville, a police report said. There Downs saw an empty black BMW, which appeared to have driven through tall shrubs, resting at an incline against the building.
When Downs came in, an agitated Cue shouted at him that "all I wanted was an (expletive) beer and they would not sell it to me," the report said.
Yes, all poor Harry wanted was a beer, and yet, for some reason beyond the imagination of the mere mortals that shuffle along our planet, nobody would sell him one, after driving into the Wimpy's.
It actually turns out that Wimpy's was nought but an innocent bystander, as Cue drove into it after local supermarket Fancy's refused to cash a check so that he could buy a six-pack.
Flying into a massive Hulk-Smash Rage, Cue (totally, completely understandably) decided to get into his car and drive straight into the restaurant, which we should remember was not the supermarket that declined him his evening libations.
There were also some windows smashed right next to where Cue's BMW (not actually the one pictured above, as no photos of the crash could be found online) went into the restaurant, but this was not Cue's fault, as there must have been a ghost:
Cue admitted to driving into the building maliciously, but said he did not break the window, police said.
Somehow, this was accepted as satisfactory.
Patrolman Downs, the police officer who was now wondering how his life had gone so wrong that he was dealing with this, surely had sympathy for Cue after hearing his excuse:
"It's my $100,000 car and I'll do whatever I want," Cue told Downs.
Oddly enough, it appears as if Cue was actually correct in this situation. Despite being arrested and held overnight, the police department is only requiring him to take a driver's test to get back his license.
As for the car, the local news doesn't say what it was. Patrick takes the man at his word and thinks it's a newer BMW M6. I'm thinking 1993 325i is more likely. Though that may be a bit generous.
I'm going to use that excuse now, regardless of the dollar value of my vehicle. "It's my $700 car, and I'll do whatever I want!"
Try that out at home, see how it goes.
Do not try that out at home, and see how it goes. Any guesses as to what he was driving?
Photo credit: Daniel Lázaro Fernandez