Car Springs Want To Kill You

We may earn a commission from links on this page.

Our pals over at Car and Driver have their equivalent of Parking Lot Mechanic, called Saturday Mechanic, and this is a clip from one of their recent episodes starring former Jalopnik writer Ben Wojdyla almost being murdered by a car that doesn't have a J-gate.

It shows a delightfully pants-filling episode with a front coil spring that thankfully left no one hurt, but it's as good a time as any to issue this public service announcement:

DON'T TRUST SPRINGS.

Springs are wildly useful, but cunning things. They're wonderful servants and cruel masters, much like, say, fire. The problem with springs is that they give so few clues about all the energy they're storing. They don't glow or shake or growl or pulse. They just sit there, under tension, constantly feeling out that one weakest bolt or clamp so they can literally spring, possibly impaling you into some drywall.

Advertisement

I've worked on some sculpture projects years ago that used leaf-spring leaves, and once while not paying enough attention I narrowly avoided getting mulched by an unexpectedly freed leaf spring leaf. Ever since then I've had a lot of respect for springs.

Advertisement

So, as the little video shows, don't turn your back on those wily springs.

And levers. Don't trust levers, either. They'll sleep with your boyfriends and/or girlfriends.

Advertisement

(Hat tip to Snap Understeer!)