Cadillac Discovers What Happens When You Fuck With Anthony Bourdain
Anthony Bourdain is to food what Martin Luther was to Catholicism. Technically, he's an insider, but he disdains the popular and false idols (Paula Deen/Guy Fieri) and tries to bring what seemed sacred and exceptional to the masses.
They also both possess the righteous heretic's gift of a sharpened tongue.
His show on the Travel Channel ended this week, but not without the advertising folks at the network splicing in footage of the Cadillac XTS with promos for his show to make it seem like he's being driving one to all the exotic locations on his show. He hasn't, and he took to Twitter to remind people of that.
Hard to pick a favorite here, although the idea of a semen- and blood-stained Cadillac has a visceral flair only a gourmand like Bourdain or a thirteen-year-old boy might conjure up.
Fucking Cadillac . Greedy venal #travelchannel ad sales motherfuckers.
— Anthony Bourdain (@Bourdain) November 6, 2012
I do NOT drive a Cadillac. And now I never will. #travelchannel
— Anthony Bourdain (@Bourdain) November 6, 2012
Last shot.......ever coming
— Anthony Bourdain (@Bourdain) November 6, 2012
If you blow your load on a #cadillac dashboard it wipes clean off!
— Anthony Bourdain (@Bourdain) November 6, 2012
There's a dead prostitute in the trunk of my #Cadillac
— Anthony Bourdain (@Bourdain) November 6, 2012
#Cadillac The blood and spooge wipe right off ! #travelchannel
— Anthony Bourdain (@Bourdain) November 6, 2012
When a #travelchannel exec runs over a hobo in a #Cadillac, I'm told they can barely tell! #goodsuspension
— Anthony Bourdain (@Bourdain) November 6, 2012
Later, when it was implied he might be getting money from the exchange he clarified that wasn't happening.
Cadillac was caught off guard by the exchange and says it isn't their fault (you can see the promo here).
"The Travel Channel produced the promos," Cadillac's David Caldwell explained. "So we're in the crossfire of Bourdain's feud with Travel Channel. We can all agree that Mr. Bourdain and Travel Channel going their separate ways seems like the right result."
Actually, probably better off being in a feud with Bourdain than Luther as the former is probably nicer. Just check out the Martin Luther insult generator.
You think like this, "As I am a crude ass, and do not read the books, so there is no one in the world who reads them; rather, when I let my braying heehaw, heehaw resound, or even let out a donkey's fart, then everyone will have to consider it pure truth."
Hilarious.
Despite the critiques, Cadillac is taking the insults fairly well.
"If you're asking me about his actual tweets...," Caldwell said. "I don't think we'd take too seriously the things people say when going through a bitter divorce."
I love Bourdain, but maybe he's being needlessly harsh here. You, me, a Cadillac CTS-V wagon. BBQ. I know a great place, Tony. We'll tear some shit up.