Canadian Cayenne Copiously Covered In Crap

In the art-car world, the entry-level project is to simply glue a bunch of crap to your car. It doesn't take too much skill or effort, and can really inject some personality in your rusty '93 Corolla. If you actually have a vision and some talent, it can even turn out pretty cool. The one hard and fast rule, though, is that the car upon which crap is adhered is usually a $900 shitbox you just don't care about otherwise. That's what makes these photos from a Toronto parking lot so incredible.

That's a Porsche. Yes, it's the SUV Porsche, the Cayenne, but that's still a real, $50,000 minimum car. And it's covered in crap. Look at that thing. LED flashlights, bargain parts-bin reflectors, Chinatown junk-stall statuettes, reflective safety tape, all epoxied or, in some horrific cases, screwed into the bodywork.

There's sort of a coherent color scheme, sort of a giant red-and-white peppermint sort of vibe, but beyond that it just looks like glittery chaos. On a Cayenne. Usually, when you see a car like this, there's a good chance the owner lives in it, and has a manifesto of Xeroxed pages with tiny, tiny handwriting explaining how the Jews and Smurfs have joined forces to poison our drinking water with aspartame. The fact that it's on a Porsche adds so much more to this.

Canadian Cayenne Copiously Covered In Crap

I'd love to know the story behind this car. Sullen rich teen letting his parents know he or she's not into their materialism? Dot-com burnout? Val Kilmer went off his meds?

I'm sure there's a story there. All I know is, whatever point you're trying to make, friend, congratulations. You've made it. I believe you.

Canadian Cayenne Copiously Covered In Crap

(Thanks, Razvan!)