2013 Nissan Altima: Even NASA Seats Can't Make It Cool

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This is the internet, so I'm sure there's someone out there waiting breathlessly for the reveal of the new 2013 Nissan Altima, in the same way I'm sure there's someone out there who gets sexually aroused by crown moldings.

For the rest of us, we can try and get some joy out of the fact that this is the Altima's first decent update since 2007, and that the new Nissan is a heart-stopping 36 mm wider in front and rear track. Take a minute to let that sink in.

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The almost-invisible sedan moves thanks to either a 2.5 L four making a respectable 180 hp or a 3.5 L V6 making about 270 hp or so. Nissan tells us that it'll get better fuel economy than a BMW 328i, which is sort of a weird comparison, since the consumer comparing a 328i and a Altima based on fuel economy is so rare there's probably a rural Chinese doctor who wants to grind them up to give you longer-lasting erections.

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Of greater interest are the "NASA-inspired, zero-gravity" seats, which are said to "reduce muscular and spinal loads and improve blood flow." Most NASA seats I've seen are full of straps and ejectors and that sort of thing, so I'm preparing to be underwhelmed. They've also thrown in Bluetooth and blind spot and lane departure warning systems as standard.

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The visual refresh is pretty complete, giving the Altima Nissan's new corporate maw and a generally sleek look, but sleek in the way pretty much everything is sleek now. It'll start at $21,500, and I'm sure will be just fine for your midsize sedan needs. In fact, it's hard to imagine anything more midsize sedan-y than this.