New York City's new "Taxi of Tomorrow" still friggin' sucks

Nissan's revealed some new features this morning on the new "NV 200 Taxi" — aka, the "Taxi of Tomorrow" — aka, the "Taxi that friggin' sucks." Here's the "new" details we're learning today:

Planned Standard Features
• Spacious cargo area to accommodate luggage for four passengers
• A transparent roof panel to provide unique views of the city
• Sliding doors with grab handles and an entry step for easy entry and exit
• USB charging access for passengers, as well as a 12V electrical plug
• Independent, passenger controlled rear-seat heat/air conditioning with a grape phenol-coated air filter to improve cabin air quality
• Flat floor - with no hump
• Enhanced interior materials intended to help the passenger cabin smell fresher
• Breathable, anti-microbial, easy-to-clean and environmentally friendly seat upholstery

Other Vehicle Features
• 2.0L 4-cylinder engine, engineered to enhance the emission performance and fuel efficiency of the taxi fleet
• A low-annoyance horn with exterior lights that show when the vehicle is honking, helping reduce noise pollution
• Overhead reading lights for passengers and floor lighting to help locate belongings
• A six-way adjustable driver's seat that features both recline and lumbar adjustments, even with a partition installed

Safety Features
•Front and rear-seat occupant curtain airbags, as well as seat-mounted airbags for the front row
• Standard traction control and Vehicle Dynamic Control (VDC)
• Sliding doors to lessen risk of pedestrians, cyclists and other motorists getting struck by doors opening unexpectedly
• Lights that alert other road users that taxi doors are opening

But yes, it's still a friggin' minivan.