Wicked, the Broadway musical is a re-imagining of Baum's The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. Today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe Wicked Porsche Twin Turbo has also been re-imagined, but is its price as fat as its ass?
Fat is not a word that could be used in describing yesterday's 1972 Lancia Fulvia, unless it was used in regard to the chubby that the car gave many of you, which resulted in it racking up a decisive 64% Nice Price win. The old saying goes that you can never be too rich or too thin, but for that Lancia, you'd only have to be the latter.
For today's 2001 Porsche 911 Twin Turbo, you might need to be the former, but that's okay, because all you Richie Riches just got a nice fat tax cut for Christmas. Another thing you could find under the tree this year is a new CD from ‘80s panty-wetters, Duran Duran. Revamped and retooled for a new generation, they maintain a connective thread to their past iteration by still having fabulous hair. Like the Wild Boys, this 2001 Porsche 911 Twin Turbo has been remade, but not by a record company but by a company called Wicked Motor Works, which hails from the the porn capital of the World, California's San Fernando Valley. Wicked started by scrapping off much of its 996-ness and replacing it with some 997 steel. Not stopping there, they've also added a nose extension and a rear end thats so huge it may cause randy baboons to seek carnal intimacies with it. And as there are four tailpipes spewing forth from its massive rear valance, it could accommodate a quartet of them at a time.
Sweet monkey love aside, this 28,000 mile 911 sports the twin turbo version of Porsche's 3.8-litre wasserboxer, which is good for nearly 420-hp and can rocket the all-wheel drive car to sixty in under 4 seconds. Those baboons would have to be especially randy in order to keep up. Wicked's bodywork looks professional, although its styling is obviously an acquired taste- the aforementioned widetail being so asstacular that Ice-T might potentially mistake it for his wife. The nose extension also makes the car look like the dentist gave it too much Novocain, but it lacks any major form of douchebaggery like Lambo doors or an egregious paint scheme.
Inside the clock gets turned back a decade as it's all 996 in there, and the dash - which the 996 shared with the Boxster - isn't one of Porsche's styling moments of glory. Aside from that, there's something going on with the leather on the driver's seat squab, and then there's the issue with the transmission - it's the Tiptronic. Now, I know that three pedal cars are de rigueur here as they're perceived to be ‘more Jalop', but it should be noted that there are a whole lot of benefits to the TIP in a 911 - the least of which is that it can probably do a better job of gear selection than you can. There's also less stress on the halvsies, and you can do the deed without taking your hands off the wheels as the car has shift rockers built into two of the three spokes. But still, haters gonna' hate.
Another thing you might hate, and which could be a deal-killer as far as this car is concerned, is the probable reason for all the cosmetics- this Wicked 911 Twin Turbo wears the scarlet letter that is a salvage title. That means getting insurance is potentially going to be a bitch, but then again, insuring a one-off, twitchy-handling, rear-engined super car wouldn't be all that easy to begin with. Regardless, it's important to know that somebody in this car's history was an ass clown resulting in it having enough damage through accident or theft for it to be written off as dead.
If you haven't written it off after all that, then it's time to get down
and get funky to brass tacks, and talk money. This baby got back Porsche has been up on eBay more than once, and each time the seller - Wicked - asks the same price for it. But as the saying goes, there's an ass for every saddle, and there many be someone who's willing to be saddled with a $74,999 bill for this wide ass.
What do you think, is that a price that might make you as enamored with the car as are those baboons? Or, does that conspire to make this Porsche one wicked expensive wide ass?
Help me out with NPOCP. Click here to send a me a tip, and remember to include your commenter handle.