PCH, LeMons Cars For The Street Edition: Cadillac Fleetwood or Volvo Wagon?

Welcome to Project Car Hell, where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Wearing a helmet in your daily driver is cool. Really!

Yeah, once a car gets a full roll cage and fixed racing seat it becomes slightly less comfortable as a commuter car, but you'll get used to it. The Faster Farms Chickens' 1966 Belvedere takes one team member to work and back every day, five-point harness, no side glass, the works. His friends and family edge away from him in horror think he's a hero for his choice of vehicle, and now you could inspire the same pity respect! We've found a couple of retired 24 Hours Of LeMons machines that fit the bill nicely.

You want your new car to be well-maintained, so what could be better than a veteran of the Battle Of The Somme, aka the mud-soaked 24-hour party that was The Lamest Day 24 Hours Of LeMons? It was just like Woodstock, only with more mud, more particle-board campfires, and way more busted engines. The Police Brutality '61 Fleetwood accomplished its mission of beating up breast cancer for charity, and now Police Brutality is ready to move on to even more terrible better race cars. For 500 bucks, you get this running, driving, fully caged 1961 Cadillac Fleetwood, winner of the Organizer's Choice trophy, and they'll even throw in a set of slightly used Fuzion HRi tires. Imagine the envy you'll inspire as you cruise the boulevard in this fine luxury race car!

You'd enjoy life to its fullest, driving that Fleetwood around town, but what if you've got a family? You could install more race seats (hey, kids are agile enough to climb in over the roll cage), but what about all the gear that you've got to haul when you've reproduced? You need a station wagon, and we can't imagine even the most uptight homeowners' association objecting to a safe-n-sensible Volvo 245. Such as, for example, the FAST-ish and the FURRiest Volvo wagon, which finished an impressive 18th at the Lamest Day and can be purchased for a mere 500 bucks. It comes with tasteful leopardskin-and-teeth decor and a nuclear-family-style rollcage, but you'll need to supply your own seats and wheels. Remember, this car blew away dozens of BMWs, Porsches, and Acuras at Nelson Ledges, so you'll feel proud to haul the family in the baddest-ass hot rod in your subdivision!

Send an email to Murilee Martin, the author of this post, at murilee@jalopnik.com.

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