Jalopnik
Thanks. All of your funny and sometimes touching stories of summer cars provided the respite we needed from the seasonal depression we're starting to feel. But it's still winter and, given some sort of Dr. Strangelove-esque nuclear war, we could end up with a permanent winter. That would be bad. That would mean no more baseball. As members of the Jalopnik brigade we're known for our ingenuity, wit and guile. We'd survive. But how would we get around?
Some of us are simple. Siler, I think, would probably tool around on a bike with a rifle and a can of olives — his girlishly long hair flapping in the radioactive wind. I'm not simple. I want everything with me. I want a gas stove, sixteen backups of everything, an 85-gallon water tank, 90 gallons of diesel and a European cassette-style toilet. For me, nothing says survival like the Earthroamer XV-LT. Based on the Ford F550 SuperDuty, this is the ultimate-yet-portable survival vehicle. It would be me, my woman and my cat driving through wasted cities and over fallout zombies. Not a bad life. What's your ultimate survival vehicle?
Comments
Bugatti Veyron. Sell it and purchase an annuity. You didn't specify apocolyptic vs. non-apocolyptic survival.
Probably an M35A2 or M109A3. Military 6x6 cargo truck (M35) or shop van (M109). Multifuel turbo diesel will run totally without electrical system, on most any fuel (diesel, biodiesel, kerosene, jet fuel, vegetable oil, etc.). Simple to work on, parts readily available and inexpensive. The very definition of rugged. Can be equipped with a 10K lb. front PTO winch, all sorts heaters (fuel fired, etc.).
Only downside is they are slow (56 mph top speed) and noisy.
Oh, No Question it would be Marvin Heemeyer's "Killdozer"
[i44.photobucket.com]
Marvin spent 18 months building this thing in his garage out of a Kamatsu Bulldozer. Here is the wiki entry:
The piece of construction equipment used in the incident was a Komatsu D335A bulldozer fitted with makeshift armor plating covering the cabin, engine and parts of the tracks. In places, the vehicle's armor was over one foot thick, consisting of concrete sandwiched between sheets of steel to make ad-hoc composite armor. This made the machine impervious to small arms fire and resistant to explosives; three external explosions and over 200 rounds of firearm ammunition fired at the bulldozer had no effect on it.
The dude was crazy, but Post appoctaliptic Bento will be able to make smart jabs at Jalopnik articles without fear of reprisals! All Hail Killdozer!
Unimog.
I have a buddy who converts Unimogs into campers. Always seemed like just the thing for TEOTWAWKI (The End Of The World As We Know It.)
An early '60s Chevy/GMC 4wd panel truck, converted to run on ethanol.
Rugged, stylish, and fixable.
Like the American cars of the fifties rolling around Havana today, I could keep that truck running forever with scrap metal, bailing wire, and duct tape.
I think it would be hard to beat that big earth rover some dude built out of milk tank trailer. Can't recall the name or find a link, but it was a big amphibious truck that looked like it belonged on the moon.
I built it out of LEGOs when I was a kid. It looked like a bunker on halftrack treads, covered with radar dishes and guns. The back door was a ramp that deployed a moon buggy-type thing.
Now, I'd opt for a flame-throwing UNIMOG.
@ash78: I figured the apocalypse was implied here.
With that in mind, I'd pick a Unimog 416 with a few drums of vegetable oil.
That spider robot we saw yesterday.
If it has to be a consumer vehicle, the Land Rover LR3 would get me everywhere comfortably, but for reliability and/or easy repairability, an FJ40 is in order.
@YankBoffin: [www.dobbertinhydrocar.com] I'd have to agree, it's huge & amphibious!
Real world - BTR-70 (russian APC)
Sci-fi world - Juggernaut from Revenge of the Sith.
[www.svguide.com]
along with a couple of good mules ... oh, and I'll take the blond accessory too!
Schwimmenwagen with the optional MG34. I can be mobile both on land and water, and I don't have to worry about my radiator freezing or boiling over regardless of what kind of hell I'm in.
No question about it. I'll be rocking the post apocalyptic world in my ARK II:
[www.geocities.com]
And when it's time to step out with a more intimate ride, the Brubaker Box, held in vitro will make the ladies swoon:
[www.70slivekidvid.com]
Smooth.
my dinky car. it doesn't allow me to go anywhere dangerous (fun). man i can't wait to get out of a car and back into a vehicle built for creating danger.
That stupid bus from a couple of days ago. The Prevost. Attach a towed Land Rover Defender 110 on it with anti-zombie armour. Of course the Prevost would have steel bars on the windows, anti-scaling fences on the roof and a couple of million candlepower floodlight system. I think that's called "Convenience Package B" on the brochure.
Modifications to said Prevost would be:
1. Cowcatcher type plow on front
2. Gun ports for the multitude of rifles on board
3. That cool chainsaw slot from Dawn of the Dead
4. Retracting outrigger wheels to prevent tip-over
5. Remote release for the trailer hitch
6. Solar panels
7. Outside gasoline tanks that double as a self-destruct system
8. Rainwater gathering system for drinking/bathing/cooking
9. "enduro" style motorcycle for recon missions
I think that that covers most of it.
The Wothehellizat1 from Australia [www.robgray.com]
Those Ozzies know the post pockyclypse like no one else.
With the WOT 1 in my posession it is virtually garanteed that Adidac runs bartertown...
Once parked it can remain self sufficient for 3 months on solar power, and large capacity water tanks, subsidized by reclaimed rain water.
It has a deck, an auxilary motorbike, a mobile repair station, 6WD and the guy that built it used to brew his own beer on board!
sadly Version 1 is no more- but DAMN...
@clinto: Beat me to it. If I suddenly come into a bunch of money, I'm going shopping at Boyce Equipment. Those guys are awesome, and 6x6s are surprisingly cheap.
AND you're getting fuel . . . where?
@bluecoupe: Yeah, that's the one: Surface Orbiter. Bring it!
i think that i would have to go with officer Rod Farva's fictional million dollar car so that if i ever got in trouble i could deploy my wings and fly away.
Make mine a diesel powered Icelandic sourced 'Mog with massive floatable tires. A Cummins powered Gravedigger perhaps.This being apocalyptic and all, maybe I could get my hands on a military LPT7A1 amphibious armored troop carrier and convert it to turbine power. Turbines, like our beloved diesel, has lot's of fuel options.
None of these are as cool as Bento's Killdozer I'm afraid.
I drive my z-day survival vehicle every day:
sportsmobileforum.com
[sportsmobileforum.com]
Any survival vehicle powered by a Powerstroke will make you rolling zombie food.
toyota hilux double cab - as proven by top gear - the toughest vehicle in the world.
my little brother is in the process of driving one from Australia to England as we speak and it has handled everything the far east can throw at it!
The beauty of the hilux is that any fool, anywhere in the world can fix it - thats the real measure of your vehicle - no sense having a unimog if no one in Afghanistan can fix it!
Camels are pretty tractable.
This thing.
@schrosa: ExxonMobile made like $5,000 billion dollars while I wrote this. ExxonMobile will be the only business in the future.
[msnbcmedia3.msn.com]
I'd have to have a Bowler Wildcat. It's not armored, so some variety of unpleasant death would likely befall me, but I'd have a hell of a good time...
JIC you guys are wondering what it is it's the Advanced Overland Transport. A really cool RV made from an old Airport crashtruck. Here is some details on it:
[www.steelwheels4x4.com]
Oh and it's for sale again.
[www.generalauction.com]
CJ7 Renegade w/ 33" muds.
Throw in my guns and my ruck. Stock on food and scavenge tanks for fuel (with a hand operated transfer pump and tubing). Simple, fast (relative to the circumstance), small and maneuverable.
The Landmaster from Damnation Alley.
@BMWCARL: Exactly. You people need to read the Zombie Survival guide if tyou plan on making it more than 5 minutes living in a post-apocalyptic undead world.
I'll be riding in style on my Hutch BMX, lopping off Zombie heads with my Katana sword and taking the odd pot-shot with my M1 Carbine rifle, but only when I can afford to make the noise. My back up weapon is a 24" steel crow bar. I have my to-go bag ready...map plotted. Apocalypse boots by the door.
@Buji: I love those things. I actually came in to say Sportsmobile (or Quigley in a pinch). I'd love to have one except for the minor problem of not being anywhere near solvent enough to purchase one. There was one for sale on eBay that belonged the the "Fast and Furious" guy when he was doing the 8 below movie. It was pretty well maxed out. Very cool.
There's also a pretty sweet AWD GM conversion called a ZRV, I think.
First you need to ask yourself: Do I need a Bug Out Vehicle (via google): [www.alpharubicon.com]
You probably do, with 11 billion people on earth this century shit might get heavy.
Next, ask yourself if the electromagnetic pulse is going to kill all the electronics on your fancy new off road RV: [en.wikipedia.org]
I'm going with the 1973 XB GT Ford Falcon Coupe for its proven post-apocalyptic capabilities.
Also, I've got first dibs on the LdHmngs plates.
That vehicle from "Stripes":
EM-50
[www.cloudster.com]
@halfshaft:
Wow almost forgot about that thing I remember seeing it on the side of the 101 when I was a kid. It was on Fox's backlot gathering dust. (It was used in an episode of "Get A Life".
@beta.rogan:
I've got that too, but i don't necessarily agree with the all tactics in the book. Stealth and quietness are perfectly fine, but the riding around on a bike is a little bit dangerous. It offers no physical protection despite it's manueverability and stealth factor. Also the fact that it is human powered really limits you. Professional cyclists have to eat tens of thousands of calories a day to sustain their efforts, and they're NOT killing zombies along the way. In a zombie-infected world, there's no guarantee that you'd be able to consume enough calories to maintain your pedalling whilst fending off brainless flesh-eaters.
You need a brick. A red brick, AKA Volvo 303:
@halfshaft: WINNAR!!! Particularly if you can get Colonel Hannibal and Stringfellow Hawke to ride shotgun.
Otherwise, I'm thinking Force Protection Buffalo. With the mine rake elevated you could skewer a cadre of zombies.
[www.forceprotection.net]
Sisu XA-185
Three important reasons:
1. Mobility: Amphibious 6x6
2. Safety: Zombie proof, also with a mounted NSV machine gun
3. Power Plant: Decent diesel engine (we all know diesel engines are versatile with fuel)
Whatever kind of toyota hilux top gear took on their north pole trip.
Sportsmobile 4x4 camper vans rule...
Kamaz 6350 converted to biodiesel/veggie. With the military armor package in case of unfriendly undead.
[kamaz.net]
Whatever the fuck this is...
The 600,000 go anywhere multibackup critter that was featured here a couple of days ago. The backups had backups.
Either that or that water going RV. I think water escape might make more sense than roaming the ever dwindling, zombie crazy harsh land. At least you can row and use a sail!
@mytdawg: Ha! It would totally confuse the zombies and the remaining survivors would worship it as a god! You'd have it made!
Or one of these would be good. I assume we can get fuel by pillaging...
@halfshaft:
That thing has been sitting at a shop on Cahuenga in Hollywood for the past 20 years or so. Go and get it!
Don't forget a little post post-apocalypse fun.
I have to agree w/ Matt. Earthroamer is the way to go. You could go for weeks on end w/o fuel. The only change I'd make would be to put it on the new Dodge 5500 chassis. I'd hate to stake my life on a Ford diesel.
.
that's an ultimate survival vehicle? In an apocolyptic scenario, how many mules are you going to need to tow your F550 cabin cruiser?
I foresee a return to sailing vessels when the oil runs low. With cannons.
...but assuming diesel is still available, I'll take one of these: www.glacierbaycats.com/lineup_3480_or.html
@JoSCh: you'd have to make sure it's equipped with the fake "Bonecrusher" mine rake, as in Transformers... cause the mine rake is really not all that strong or large.. just sayin
I've professed my love for the UNICATS before, so I gotta stick with that + solar panels from Napa in Wisconsin
@halfshaft: I love that we can put pictures in comments.
unimog or
[en.wikipedia.org]
[en.wikipedia.org]
Haven't any of you ever watched Mad Max? He who runs the refinery runs the world! Guess that kinda works now, huh?