How to be a Blogger, Courtesy the Print Dorks Over at MPH

One D. Merline over at the mph takes a potshot at us instantaneous-types, laying out a template that allows one, in full Mad Lib-fashion, to create a post as quickly as humanly possible. Watch as we try it out.

HEADLINE How to be a Blogger, Courtesy the Print Dorks Over at MPH (something pithy and clever like Because Taiwan Is Always Getting Screwed By the U.S).
According to Dave Merline (name source, usually another blog or news web site) the mphers believe that blogging is essentially an exercise in pseudo-typographic pablum, talkin' loud, sayin' nothin', and easily stereotyped. (neatly summarize the blog/article on which you car to comment). Now, some people may believe bloggers are at the forefront of a semi-journalistic revolution (state commonly held opinion that you are about to turn on its head), but to me, it's fairly obvious that they're mostly eating the print mags' news lunch while more-than-occasionally offering incisive commentary at least in the case of Gawker Media's Jalopnik. (express contrary idea, using slightly condescending tone). In fact Merline (author of blog/article) is clearly a three-toed sloth (insert insulting word, phrase, or physical description). Even my pancreas (son, dog, random body part) knows this. In fact, the other day I was fondly remembering women who'd once shattered my heart (describe tenuously related, barely interesting detail of your daily life) and I decided to go for a walk down to the bodega (explain random thought or picture that popped into your head on said occasion). Therefore I think we can all agree that the print guys are jealous of our power and the size of our penii (restate your opinion in a way that makes anyone who disagrees with you seem like a jackass).

Give Us This Day Our Daily Blog [mph]

Related:
Autoextremist on the Impending Doom of Car Mags [Internal]