You did it! YOU! You made it through another entire work week, and I can’t express how proud we all are of you here. You’re the chili in our chiliburgers, the odd liquid in the center of our Chewels, the cheese in the middle of our cheese-injected hot dogs. Please accept this 1964 Glas 1500 as a token of our esteem.

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About the author

Jason Torchinsky

Senior Editor, Jalopnik • Running: 1973 VW Beetle, 2006 Scion xB, 1990 Nissan Pao, 1991 Yugo GV Plus • Not-so-running: 1973 Reliant Scimitar, 1977 Dodge Tioga RV (also, buy my book!)