Paris Checks In To Jail, We Lose Easy Jokes For Three Weeks

As you can see from the TMZ video above, Paris surrendered herself to the authorities out in Cali last night to serve her sentence for violation of parole after her DUI. That means for the next 45 days (23 as long as Paris is on good behavior), we'll be totally Paris-free. That's three long weeks without glimpses of her sliding out of a Mercedes SLR, losing a Bentley (and her top) in a poker game, garage hit-and-run action, DUI-action and losing her Continental GTC to the police. You know, despite the loss of such easy jokes for the next three weeks, we're pretty certain we'll get on just fine without her. Maybe she'll even shiv someone and have to spend the full 45 days. One can only dream.


Paris Hilton checks into Los Angeles County jail [CNN]

Paris Hilton [internal]


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You just watch. She'll have to beat some bitch down within the first 6 hours, then end up forming a gang and starting a prison riot. 6 years later, she'll come out a battle-hardened butch ready to kick men in the nuts repeatedly.

If that doesn't happen, then I hope she gets shivved herself. "EXCLUSIVE PARIS HILTON PRISON SEX VIDEOS HERE!!!1one!1"