Okay, maybe “weird” is a bit of hyperbole, but these are at least some interesting and perhaps unexpected things that I found while looking through the 2021 Ford Mustang Mach-E owner’s manual, which was uploaded to the internet prior to actually getting into any buyer’s hands by our pals over at the Mach-E Forum. Fundamentally, it’s just an owner’s manual, but it does reveal some interesting things about the Mach-E, Ford’s first real mass-market electric car.
If you’re considering buying a Mach-E, perhaps this will help you, or if you’re just the sort of weirdo who loves car owner’s manuals, then perhaps you’ll get your rocks removed as well.
Anyway, let’s dig in:
There’s Really Three Animals On The Back
Everyone knows about the horse in the center of the tailgate, but what I didn’t realize until looking at the illustrations in this manual is that the taillights sure look like a pair of stylized elephants, trunks extended threateningly forward, squaring off on either side of that horse, which I suspect they’re both attempting to claim as their prize.
Now I can’t stop seeing it.
The Sub-Frunk World Is Wildly Complex
Even though the front end of the Mach-E seems like a pleasingly simple and empty void you can fill with shrimp or luggage, the truth is that the simplicity is just a mirage, and underneath lurks this wildly complex maze of coolant pipes and reservoirs and fuse boxes and other stuff. Here’s what those letters are pointing to:
Oh, and while getting to this Hidden Zone of Complexity doesn’t require tools, there are an awful lot of tabs involved:
I want to be clear that I do not regard any of this as a negative; it would have been easy for Ford to have decided that all this complexity and hardware would negate a front trunk, but they hunkered down and packaged everything so that you could still have a nice volume of usable space upfront.
That’s a big deal, and worthy of praise.
You Better Not Nap In The Frunk If Your Battery Is Low
This I find kind of alarming, or at least a potential ass-pain. If you have a Mach-E and run out of power — I’m not entirely certain here, but I think this is especially referring to the 12V power from the (conventional, lead-acid) accessory battery — then you can’t get the frunk open.
I would have expected some sort of manual, mechanical release to handle this situation, but it looks like there isn’t one and your only option is to pop open a cover on the bumper, fish out a pair of positive and negative wires and connect those to a 12V power source to get the frunk open.
So, if you’ve playfully filled that thing with puppies and kittens and closed it just for a moment to drive across the parking lot to the puppy and kitten romp area, you better be damn well sure your 12V battery is in good shape.
If You Have A Power Liftgate, Forget About A Bike Rack
I’m sure a lot of Mach-E potential owners are also bike owners, and I bet many of those bike owners use one of those rear-mounted bike racks since they’re usually easier to get bikes on and off compared to roof-mounted bike racks.
If that’s you, then be sure you don’t order your Mach-E with the powered tailgate, because it looks like they don’t want you sticking a bike rack on there. I didn’t see the same warning for the unpowered, manual liftgate, though.
Automatic High Beam Control Will Not Free You From Your Moral Obligations
Ford wants to remind you that even if the car is adjusting the high beams on and off by itself, that doesn’t mean you can start driving like an asshole. Just in case you thought, hey, if it can turn off the brights, why the hell am I bothering not to run people off the road?
Oooohhhhhhhhhhhhh
Thanks for clearing that up!
Charging sure seems safe
Nothing to worry about with charging! Of course, I realize charging is just fine, and this all has to be in there for legal reasons, but it’s still striking to see a whole page of panic-warnings.
Also, if you want to “put fingers into the electric charge coupler,” then maybe driving isn’t the sort of thing you should be doing, maybe? Also, please note that the warnings do not mention anything similar about penises, so, you know, I’m sure that’s fine!
This May Come In Handy If You Need To Get Away Fast
I’ve heard complaints from people in various EVs about chargers not releasing properly, or, how if the power is lost, a charger cable can get stuck in the port, effectively trapping you and your car there.
Here are the emergency manual release instructions in case that happens. It looks like you have to take out the whole inner frunk liner to get to it, so If you’re in a real hurry, maybe just drive off fast and tear the cable off the charger. But I didn’t tell you to try that.
It Was My Understanding There Would Be No Math
I know Ford is trying to help here, but they’ve effectively turned this section on how much you can carry into an excruciating set of word problems that will likely give you seventh-grade math homework PTSD flashbacks:
Oh god it’s so dense! The leading of that massive block of word problem is so tight and the sheer math-density of it all just makes me want to drop my head to my desk and pass out like I did with all my math homework.
Is This For Anything Other Than Comforting Parents They Won’t Lock Their Kids In There?
Aside from keeping a non-sectioned toddler from fitting in that trunk, what’s the point of this luggage compartment divider? I guess there are specialized things that would benefit from separation in the trunk — foxes and chickens, or something like that.
Still, I bet it’s just a parental ease-of-mind thing.
Hey! Want To Tow A Trailer With Your Mach-E?
Too bad, fucko!
Not A Bad Tip For Cold-Assed EV Drivers
I guess heating an ass is easier than heating the ambient air inside a whole car. That makes sense.
What If I Just Love Towing?
I know what they mean by this, it’s for people who might want to tow a Mach-E behind, say, a motorhome, but I just like the idea that there are recreational towing enthusiasts out there, people who just like the activity of pulling one vehicle behind another, just for the sheer joy of it all.
Oh, and if those people do exist, it looks like you shouldn’t get a Mach-E.