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Mar 4, 2009 12:01 AM
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Judging by the concepts and production cars making their debuts in Geneva this week, the auto industry hasn't noticed the Carpocalypse, bringing out supercars, exotics and mega luxury vehicles. Here's everything from day one.
If we were to describe this car to you in writing, you'd think it was lame, but somehow in pictures, it's the hottest thing since sliced bread. Inexplicable but awesome.
Using the old model's 268 HP turbocharged engine, the Mazdaspeed gains a Furai-like grille and we're ok with that.
Bugatti's got a thing for blue and it's got a super expensive hypercar to sell. So why not combine the two for a mutual win-win? As silly as we think this is, the combination of matte and gloss blue (or Bleu if you're super rich) is surprisingly nice.
The DB9 too common for you? Then how about a one of 77 (get it?) limited run of a super fast, super luxurious model based on the same platform? Sounds good to us, but then anything with over 750 HP sounds good to us.
Just like a volt, but wearing eyeliner. Somehow, we think this is GM's attempt at a subtle insult to its more successful, better looking, but slightly effeminate European relatives.
What if we combined the sexy lines of a sportscar with the high clearance and off-road ability of a 4x4 and the luxurious interior of a sedan into one car? Great idea, let's call it a "crossover." Oh, wait; it's not 1999 anymore? Damn, back to the drawing board.
When I was a kid, the SV versions of Lamborghinis existed to snuff out the trashiest of the uber rich with their tacky graphics, then kill them off with dangerously unpredictable handling. It was like Lamborghini was some kind of ancient secret society that existed to promote natural selection. We're guessing Tom Hanks has somehow infiltrated the company, because this SV has AWD and won't likely kill anything but innocent spotted owls and polar bears.
Ray worships at the alter of this track-focused, ultra-light version of the Pagani Zonda. Somehow, that's the least disturbing thing we've found out about him this week.
How do you make the ugliest supercar on sale even uglier? Easy: a two-tone aquamarine and white paintjob. There's also some Aurora-esque bodywork. Yuck.
Somewhere, there's a market for tuned Veyrons. This one has 1,109 HP and exposed carbon bodywork. Who buys these things?
There's a magical land where small cars are both appealing, good to drive, nice to sit in and highly efficient. That magical place's name is Europe, it also has good cheese. We think VW USA is crazy for giving us a rebadged Golf instead of a rebadged Diesel Polo as the Rabbit.
Solar electric cars get free energy from the sun, but they're really slow. Enter Koenigsegg. The 512 Quant, we don't know how they did it, but somehow it sounds like they connected the sun directly to its rear wheels.
We kinda wish Mitsubishi would hurry up and put an iMiEV into mass production, but for the time being we're pretty happy with the Sport Air and its Tron-like interior. Sunglasses required.
Wow, probably the best looking car at the show; like a Ferrari California, but attractive. If the G37 looked like this we'd be all over it.
Previewing the next Focus, the Iosis Max is fitted with an Ecoboost (Newspeak for turbocharger) 1.6-liter engine putting out 180 HP. Make sure you bring this one to the States please Ford.
The most appealing thing about the Audi TT are its clean, uninterrupted lines. So bolting a big honking wing to the back does little for us. Having said that, the 335 HP, 331 Lb-Ft turbocharged five-cylinder does.
You run a successful daytime talk show in which you convince guests to dance and you need plenty of room in the trunk for your burgeoning collection of men's trousers. Your first instinct says "Subaru Outback" but you've got money now and you want something a touch classier. The A4 allroad quattro is the car for you.
370 HP and a 187 MPH top speed from a .8-liter engine and two electric motors. It will also find weapons of mass destruction in Iraq and single handedly save the world from aliens. Man, this car sounds awesome.
Ferrari buyers are a fickle lot, always wanting new and better features if they're going to be convinced to pry open their wallets for a new, six-figure supercar. The HGTE adds firmer suspension, stickier tires and a lower ride height.
The MiTo GTA is the best looking small car we've seen in the last thirty years or so. We're probably not going to ever get one here in Obama land. Still, those big new exhaust pipes are awful good to look at.
The new, smaller Rolls is still over a foot longer than a BMW 7-Series and every bit a Roller deserving of the retracting Spirit of Ecstasy hood ornament.
Dramatic in detail, outdated in profile and mechanical spec. Yep, it's another Spyker.
Send an email to Wes Siler, the author of this post, at wes@jalopnik.com.
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