Just when we were starting to get excited about the possibility of an American Top Gear, with or without Adam Corolla as host, someone clues us to Scott VanPala's Heavy Metal, which may be the worst knock-off of our favorite show we've come across (and we've seen a few of them). We don't know what's worse: the bad alliteration ("the Caddy is about as capable as a cabbage") the strange conclusions (buy a Murano) or the subtle racism. Wait, we know. It's the guy's annoying voice ("Mista patata hed"). New Jersey's Kermit the Frog shouldn't be doing auto programs. We'd much rather have Leno. [Autostreamfilms via Motive Forums]