For generations, hopelessly asocial men have bought cars in the hopes of attracting women. Jalopnik readers know that more often than not, the plan backfires in the harshest way.
Welcome back to Answers of the Day - our daily Jalopnik feature where we take the best ten responses from the previous day's Question of the Day and shine it up to show off. It's by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers. Enjoy!
The curious thing about this list is that while nobody can seem to agree on what cars will actually get you laid, the dude-pulling capabilities of certain cars are instantly plain. Without question, car enthusiasts collectively have much more experience with dude-attraction than anything else. There must be hundreds of thousands of American boys and men who have poured their money into high-horsepower sports and muscle cars, only to end up at car shows talking to each other.
So this list could easily be twenty or thirty cars long. If you've owned a car that brought guys out of the woodwork that we didn't have space to mention, let us know in Kinja below.
And before we go into our list proper, we just want to say that the very ultimate in dude-attraction is the growing hobby of buying tanks. The only thing that brings with women is a divorce.
Photo Credit: Eva Rinaldi
10.) Mitsubishi Evo
Sure the Evo is one of the fastest cars you can get for the money, but girls will only ask you why you stuck a huge wing on your Corolla.
Suggested By: For Sweden, Photo Credit: chelle_1278
9.) Toyota Supra
While a nicely-tuned Supra is a piece of art, all anyone knows them for is The Fast and the Furious, which is not a good look.
Suggested By: austin webb, Photo Credit: JAK SIE MASZ
8.) Corvette ZR1
You might think that the fastest Vette would get them wet, but fanboys are the only people swarming the ZR1 every time it parks. If you want to pull middle-aged men, here's your car.
Suggested By: ImSam, Photo Credit: Thomas Moller Nielsen
7.) Old Jeeps
Finding a girl who's into Jeeps isn't the hardest thing in the world, but if you pull up in something blocky and old with a seven-slot grill, you'll have to wade through a sea of Jeep-loving dudes to get to her.
Suggested By: Who needs sway bars anyway?, Photo Credit: Raphael Orlove
6.) The DeLorean
A DeLorean DMC-12 seems like it should be a perfect car for pulling chicks. It's not too fast, it looks cool, and it has a big nostalgia factor. I mean, it was even in that one video with that guy with the fur coat.
Sadly, the car is going to get mobbed by Back to the Future nerds more than anything else, or people who want to re-tell you the story of how John Z. got tied up in a cocaine scandal.
Suggested By: NoFear365, Photo Credit: pyntofmyld
5.) Ford Lightning
We might think that factory sport trucks would be a hit with the fairer sex, but Lightning owner Jstas says we couldn't be farther from the truth.
Even on the street, you get looks and heads snapping around as the truck rumbles up to a stoplight or passes a school bus and it's always the boys pointing and you can see their mouths forming "WHOA!" as you pass by. It's always guys that give you a thumbs up or a "Nice truck!" when you pull up to the 7-Eleven. Girls will glance at it and just shrug it off or think you're just some asshole redneck with a little penis.
Suggested By: Jstas, Photo Credit: Greg Myers
4.) Dodge Viper
Reader JoeyJoeJoeShabadu says he used to work for Chrysler corporate, where he saw the ultimate failing of the old SRT-10.
Sure it's an absolute track beast. Fast, stiff, and will thread any needle so long as the hole you're aiming for is eight feet wide. But pull into the gas station and its almost magnetic the number of bro's asking for me to pop the hood or take'm for a ride.
It's painful.
The jury is still out on the new SRT Viper, but we're not optimistic.
Suggested By: JoeyJoeJoeShabadu, Photo Credit: Thomas Møller Nielsen
3.) Nissan GT-R
Non-car loving girls have no clue what it is, until you tell them you drive a Nissan and they look away. The people who do know that the car is capable of are almost all college dudes. Unless you carry a GameCube in your backpack and want to chill, that's not great.
Suggested By: emanresu, Photo Credit: Shawn Ashley
2.) New Lamborghinis
You would think that something like a rusty rat rod would only interest nine-hundred-year-old hot rodders named Clarence and a showroom-fresh Aventador would pull women like you wouldn't believe, but you'd have it backwards. Hot Rod Magazine's Roadkill put it to the test and found a new Lambo only attracted bros.
Suggested By: The Swedish Bandit, Photo Credit: Roadkill/Hot Rod/MotorTrend
1.) Any '60s Muscle Car
There's an exception here: if your '68 Mercury Cougar is sitting on 22s with some kandy paint and a redone interior, you can definitely pull some ladies in the right part of town. If you're the kind of guy who talks about your 4:11 Positrac outback, 750 double pumper, Edelbrock intake, bored over 30, and 11 to 1 pop-up pistons, give up hope now.
Suggested By: TurbineGuy and My X-type is too a real Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag, Photo Credit: Eva Rinaldi