Babies are, basically, tiny humans with a propensity for making enormous messes. This Holden Captiva learns that the hard way when a baby has a "number 3" — you know, a "poop explosion" — in this Australian diaper ad. Gross.
I have a kid who, while very young, developed a very regular #2 habit: Wednesday evenings. Nursed babies don't mess quite so much as bottlefed, though there are the usual number of wet diapers to deal with. But the narstier ones, not so much. Thus, the once-a-week schedule. And it was fantastic. Nothing can top having a kid who you know will not utterly ruin your trip to the park with a Superfund site in his britches.
Until he skipped a Wednesday. Then he'd gone over ten days. Then we're closing in on two weeks He's starting to get uncharacteristically cranky and fussy. We knuckle under and call Ask-A-Nurse. She says give the kid some castor oil and everything should be fine, some babies just get a little anal retentive - literally. She's never actually seen a once-a-week kid but doesn't think it's totally out of the realm of possibility, and other long-interval kids sometimes get this retention thing going, so do the castor oil and see what happens.
We did the castor oil.
About an hour later there was this...sound. And the kid's face suddenly got really horrified and relieved and inside the diaper was Mt. Vepoopius, a mountain of poo like you've never seen unless you own a Saint Bernard. We changed him on a big sheet of newspaper opened up, and some still got away. We blamed that spot on the cat, but we knew. So did the cat.
What's this got to do with cars? Not a damn thing. #adwatch