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This item originally attracted our attention because on Google News, it read: "At least eight people have been hospitalized after a car went into the crowd at the Madison Regatta peed boat race Sunday." We were gonna make a "peed boat" joke, but the story itself was sufficiently mind-boggling to post straight. Apparently, an 18-year-old kid was driving at a high rate of speed when he lost control, hurtled through the crowd assembled to watch the hydroplane races and on into the Ohio River. Eleven people, including the driver of the wayward car, were injured. Stay safe this 4th, kids. And watch out for idiots on the road. [Reader Charles points out our pre-holiday stupidity. This happened in Ohio, not Wisconsin. D'oh. Oh wait. It didn't happen in Ohio. It happened in Indiana. Thanks to the Midwest for busting our coastal balls on it.]

Car Drives Into Crowd During Madison Regatta [WISH]

One-Car Pileup Takes a Life in Detroit [Internal]