Krush Groove had everything as a film about hip-hop: Shiela E., Run-D.M.C., LL Cool J, The Beastie Boys, and even Debbie Harry. You know what it didn't have? A plot. I love all the performers and the soundtrack is fantastic, but the film's lacking one major device: a plot. I think something happens. There's some rapping. the Fat Boys run around for a bit. Some kids I knew in high school got it thinking it would be epic. It's just not. As an 80s music film it doesn't hold a candle to Prince's Purple Rain, just like few musical comments hold a candle to Mazarin's riff on our Prince-inspired speeding post.
"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to get through this place called Wadena. Speed limited, Wadena. It means slow and that's a mighty boring ride. But I'm here to tell you there's something else - the Autobahn. A road of never-ending happiness. You will never see a speed limit, day or night. So when you call up that traffic attorney in Minneapolis, you know the one, Mr. Everything'll-Be-All-right, instead of asking him how much of your money is left, ask him how much of your gas, baby. 'Cause in this county, things are much slower than on the Autobahn. This road you're on your own. And if the rev-limiter tries to bring you down, go crazy - punch a higher gear."