You'll Probably Get Kicked Out Of The New Brabus Store In London

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Still relentlessly crapping out glittery shit like Hedonism Bot with explosive diarrhea, Brabus has built a "flagship shop" in London. There you can look their tasteful vehicles (don't touch, peasant!), sip some espresso (better not call it x-presso... peasant), and potentially leave five hundred grand poorer.

Surely you remember Brabus; champions of automotive excess with toys like a twin-turbo G-Wagen and that Fast & Furious-style Range Rover Sport.

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The store opened May 15th on Park Lane in London's Mayfair neighborhood. Would you believe Brabus already has stores in 106 countries, for no possible reason besides waving their B-emblazoned balls in the faces of the proletariat?

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It blows my mind that it makes sense for Brabus to have that big of a brick-and-mortar footprint. Their sales consultants, who are trained at Brabus' Bottrop, Germany headquarters, must waste so much time entertaining plebeians going in there to push buttons and get peace-sign pictures in front of the six-wheeled G-Wagen.

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But who am I to question the unwavering wisdom of the folks who make Mercedes' loudest offering even more ostentatious?

Looks like they've pretty much got all the toys; TV (why look at cars when you can watch the news), a decent-looking coffee machine (nothing feels more premium than waiting-room coffee), and brightly-colored handkerchiefs for your sneezing convenience!

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Who's been to one of these Brabus shops, and how much fun did they let you have in there?

Images: Brabus