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Watch These Australians Take 'Safety Third' Very, Very Seriously

GIF via tobyio

Journey with us into the unhinged bowels of the Australian wilderness, where the extremely Australian sounding duo of Skat and Wozza have a Ford Festiva modified to get “more fuckin’ airborne, mate.”

Per Australian Safety Standard No. 35035S, section A, part U WOT M8?, subheading “We Made This Up,” feats of “hold my beer and watch this” are no longer permitted unless the beer is shown in the introduction to the film.


Please take care to use the appropriate size of nail when constructing your ramp built of a few sparse random boards, and be sure to don a motorcycling helmet and a short wetsuit should you be engaging in activities near water. This is a family show, so we need to keep things to the utmost standard of safety third.

“It’s all about family values,” Skat explains. “Really, it’s about family values and beer. Beer. Victoria Bitter, mother’s milk.”


The little Festiva didn’t want to give up even after launching into a pond, but was ultimately consumed by fire. Rust in peace, Festiva.

[Disclaimer: Jalopnik does not recommend that you try this at home. The only place you should be driving after a few beers is in Gran Turismo or iRacing.]

Moderator, OppositeLock. Former Staff Writer, Jalopnik. 1984 "Porschelump" 944 race car, 1971 Volkswagen 411 race car, 2010 Mitsubishi Lancer GTS.

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It would have jumped farther had it not been for the downforce created by that wing.