UPS to Infuriate NASCAR, Eliminate Left Turns

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What's worse that a big, brown and ugly truck clogging up the streets everyday? Probably a big, brown and ugly truck constantly moving through traffic and clogging up the street. There are 95,000 UPS trucks out everyday and soon they will be drastically reducing the amount of left turns, focusing the delivery routes on making mostly right turns (I wonder if the same rule will apply for Dale Jarrett's UPS-sponsored car — that could get real messy). Eliminating the left turns will reportedly save three million gallons of gas annually.

The new and improved routes will reduce the delivery routes by 28.5 million miles and reduce CO2 emissions by 31,000 metric tons. The new system begins at the sorting facility. A special software will load packages onto trucks in a method to maximize the amount of right turns and eliminating unnecessary left turns that requires the trucks to sit idle wasting gas and pissing off Al Gore.

I'm sure the lazy UPS drivers will continue to cut corners (like when they throw my package of fragile gadgets 20 feet) by making unnecessary left turns, but regardless, UPS gets a gold star for the effort! Now stop double-parking to drop off packages and the world will be a better place. [New York Times]