Toyota Prius Global Cumulative Sales Pass One Million... Is That A Native American Crying?

Illustration for article titled Toyota Prius Global Cumulative Sales Pass One Million... Is That A Native American Crying?

There's no doubt the Toyota Prius is a global phenom, blazing the way for eco-conscious consumers to show the world that they really, really, really do care about the environment. And now the little-hybrid-that-could is finally passing the one million global cumulative sales mark. That means that since the Prius went on sale in 1997, the super number one best awesome automaker from the land of the rising sun's sold as many Prii as they sold heavy duty commercial vehicles in just the 2007 sales year. If that's not an environmental impact, we don't know what is. We salute you...


...Toyota — thank you for helping to make it easier for people across the world to sleep at night, comforted by the soporific effect of believing they're actually doing something, anything for the environment — and continuing the commoditization of the driving experience at the same time. Luckily, Toyota's hoping to make it to two million Prii sold in significantly less time than it took them to sell the first million. They're even hoping to reach a million hybrids a year by sometime in the 2010's. Incidentally, this past year, Toyota sold more Tundra pickups in the U.S. than Prii — to the tune of just under 200,000 of the pick-me-ups versus 181,221 of the happy hybrids. Go green! [Green Car Congress]


Oh wow-ee, a V8 Mustang! a new El Camino! a new Dodge Challenger! a new C(n+1) Corvette! How innovative! Ooh, ooh, looka there, if you give some Italians a half million dollars they'll make you a super nice luxury GT in fire-engine red, who'd ever have imagined they could do that? Oh boy, the thousandth iteration of another ridiculously overpowered V8 sports sedan with not a single speck of design in it (excepting the stereo system and sat nav) that wasn't in mass production thirty or forty years ago is so awesomely exciting!!!1!

Yeah (yaaaawn) sure. You suckers wouldn't know a really slick piece of modern engineering if it bit you on the ass. Look at the Prius's exotic three-way transmission, or its bizarro Atkinson-cycle engine, or its regenerative braking, or its drivetrain-control electronics if you want to see a few things you won't find all over 1960s and 70s back issues of Road-n-Track and Car-n-Driver. Nor are these hand-built one-of-a-kind prototypes that cost more than your house, so you can only look at them from afar, but all that badass technology is packed in a mass production car at a price Joe Median can actually afford to buy and drive himself. And oil is $120 a barrel

and it's there to stay, too, yet still all you guys can do is dis, dis, dis Toyota.

The stupidest part of the argument is how it's not enough for Toyota to have designed and built and promoted and mass-produced the Prius, no! - where, because millions upon millions of teevee-addicted Americans insist on buying three-ton V8 pickup trucks and SUVs primarily to carry one (1) person from suburbia to office parking lot and back, Toyota, a car manufacturer, is to be censured without cease for not righteously refusing all their nasty, eco-unfriendly trade. Better that the tainted profits to be extracted from all those blockheads should go exclusively to all the other car manufacturers who for decades refused to even consider making any high-quality, high-tech, high-mileage cars at all.