The Ten Worst Ways To Tow A Car

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Most Jalopnik readers possess a enough common sense to know how to tow a car, but just in case, they've identified ten ways you shouldn't try to transport your vehicle.


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Photo Credit: Weibo via Car News China

Image for article titled The Ten Worst Ways To Tow A Car

10.) With no tow straps

Suggested By: Mechina


Why it's wrong: Towing a car implies that it's somehow attached to the vehicle towing it. What's happening in this picture then isn't so much towing as it is a Grand Cherokee sitting on top of a truck, waiting to start an accident.

Photo Credit: Mechina, Facebook

Image for article titled The Ten Worst Ways To Tow A Car

9.) With something not designed for towing

Suggested By: Straightsix 9904


Why it's wrong: Just because it works doesn't mean it's a good idea. Towing a car with a motorcycle, or an underpowered econobox can be done — but you won't have a good time, it certainly won't be easy, and it's likely not at all safe.

Photo Credit: Coming Through

8.) In the back of a UHaul

Suggested By: waveridin1959


Why it's wrong: The issue of actually securing the car comes into play again here (check out Richard Hammond's experience with that issue), but the first hurdle is getting the car inside. And, well, that doesn't always go as smoothly as you'd hoped.

7.) With a human…in any way

Suggested By: Ravey Mayvey Slurpee


Why it's wrong: Pulling a car with your arms or legs is difficult, tiring, and slow. Nine out of 10 dentists recommend against pulling one with your teeth. And with your eyes, or maybe your genitals... oh God ...just please stop. Rent a truck or something, please.

6.) Sideways inside a van

Suggested By: wwu240z was the old me


Why it's wrong: How did the Mazda get inside the van? How is it getting out? That can't be good for the side of the car, right? There are so many questions surrounding this, but there are two solid takeaways: don't put a car in a van, and if you do put a car in a van, you will get stopped by the cops.

5.) With a forklift

Suggested By: MoRphine-2


Why it's wrong: Forklifts look to be surprisingly efficient way to steal cars. They also look to be surprisingly bad news for the car that's being stolen, in this case an ex-dictator's yellow Ferrari. Generally avoid the forklift as a means for transporting your car.

4.) With a rope, with the steering locked

Suggested By: brblunch


Why it's wrong: The tow-rope-with-someone-steering is already a risky strategy (just check out this story), so if you're going to try it, please don't allow the steering lock to be engaged. It's all fun and games until a WRX gets hurt like this.

3.) With the car not in neutral

Suggested By: Vracktal……


Why it's wrong: A transmission in gear or in park is designed to keep your car from rolling. Towing behind another vehicle requires the car to roll. A+B=C: put your car in neutral before you try to tow it.

2.) By a part not firmly attached to the car

Suggested By: Dr_Watson


Why it's wrong: The weight of a car should be taken into consideration when deciding where to attach you towing mechanism. Do you think the plastic bumper on your Geo can withstand 2,000 plus pounds of force, plus whatever resistance the snow is adding? The chassis probably can, which is why it's the better option.

1.) On its roof

Suggested By: Stevo777


Why its wrong: This one should be pretty self explanatory, but as the video clearly demonstrates, it is not. Cars move on wheels. Do not try to move a car on a part other than the wheels.