Now defunct Formula One team Marussia brings you a selection of gifts for the racer who has everything. Ever fancied a Formula One car, a sweet transporter or some of the high-tech tools used in F1 car design? Want the stillborn 2015 design for your wall? Check out the Marussia auction on December 16-17.
Marussia entered into administration earlier this year, dropping out in response to the ever-worsening costs of participation in Formula One. Fernando Alonso did not, in fact, buy the team for a dollar and a wad of fine Spanish pocket lint, so his loss is your gain!
Marussia did the best of the two new teams in Formula One this year, managing to beat longtime F1 team Sauber in the constructor's points. Unfortunately, financial difficulties pulled them from competition before the United States Grand Prix, forcing them to miss the last three races of the season.
The administrators in charge of Marussia's financial situation have opted to sell off the rest of the beleaguered team's assets.
Here are the most interesting items we spotted on the auction page.
Marussia's 2015 Car In Model Form (We Think)
Much speculation has been tossed around the Internet as to whether this model was the stillborn design of Marussia's 2015 race car. This interesting scale design model could be one of the most sought after pieces of the auction.
Whole Formula One Cars
Nothing compares to driving a Formula One car, so now is your opportunity to pick up one on the cheap. Just add an engine, per the listing.
The current model cars unfortunately used Ferrari power on a dominant year for Mercedes. Even though the Ferrari engine was a bit of a dog for F1, you're still guaranteed to dominate nearly any track day you enter with it.
BOOM. Instant Halloween costume.
Alternately, I see quite a few ex-pro racing suits show up in amateur racing, and these should be in spec for a few more years. Best LeMons theme ever? Yes. Here's your chance to pick up some of the required safety bits for a bit cheaper than they would be when new, provided memorabilia junkies don't drive up the price.
(Or you could be boring and have a nice piece of F1 kit to hang on the wall. That's boring, though. You should buy a race car.)
If you pick up one of the cars, you're going to need a few of these, too. Everything you'd need to run the car is here because, obviously, this is the team who ran the car.
Alternately, you could redecorate your bathroom with various carbon fiber bodywork bits. I don't know about y'all, but I find it quite relaxing to look at the various pattens of carbon fiber and kevlar weave when I sit down for a number two.
Whole carbon fiber undertrays with gold heat shielding on them are a must if you plan to run the car on bumpier non-Grade-1 circuits.
There are rows and rows of neatly organized spares here, all up for grabs. Even the bottom Formula One teams keep everything in professional order.
Things are a bit more disheveled than usual since I'm sure the administrators have had to go through everything.
Still, you should be able to find the spares you want since they're going selling it all.
Here is your opportunity to pick up a professional-style race team transporter, lightly used, on the cheap. Just think how many busted 944s you could stuff in one of these—complete with all the spares you could ever want.
Race transporters are a neat freak team owner's dream. There are bins and tool boxes everywhere, plus plugs for tools and miles of counter space.
These have enough room to stuff multiple cars inside, plus all the parts you'd need to keep them running.
There's also a soft-sided trailer up for grabs, just in case you can't bear to keep your collection of toys in the same space as your mobile tool shed.
One Very Aerodynamic Trailer
Don't have enough space to keep a full transporter around? Only have a normal tow vehicle sitting around as opposed to a semi truck? Here you go. They've got a little mini-hauler in the mix, too, and pointy-nosed trailers like these haul a car much more comfortably than your typical wind-blocking giant box trailer.
Bonus: openable side panels are awesome for getting in and out of your car after you've drived it in. Otherwise, it's a bit of a tight fit.
10/10, would haul.
Everything you'd need to make a Formula One car will be up for grabs, including all the specialized heavy machinery.
Here's your opportunity to put together the best makerspace ever.
Or you could construct a legion of carbon fiber Truck Nutz. Hey, I'd buy a pair. Do that.
Less Specialized Tools
Not everything up for grabs is space-age wizardry. Here's the most useful tool of them all: a hammer.
There's a quite nice welding machine up for grabs as well. You could be the proud owner of a former F1 team's NASCAR-endorsed welding machine!
All Manner of Testing Equipment
Anything you could think to test on a modern Formula One car could be tested here, including some stuff I can't even figure out.
All I know is that I'd play the crap out of some Forza if that giant seat-a-ma-bob device was sitting in my living room.
There's also this curious desk labelled "Non Destructive Test." The destructive tests sound a lot more fun, though.
Again, this auction is a magical wonderland for anyone who obsessively makes sure every wrench goes back in just its right place.
I don't see how they'd ever get anything done on a hyper-complex Formula One car if they didn't keep things in working order, so the miles and miles of tool bins make sense to see here.
Included in the auction's organizational arsenal are also the giant totes used to ship parts to races. I really hope these aren't unpacked for the auction's sake, but rather get sold off as Formula One's version of a w00t-style Bag of Crap.
Box of Crap. Well, except it's not crap. There's neato Formula One parts if anything's in there.
If all else fails, you get a nifty shipping box, right?
Yes, even the offices are up for grabs.
Perhaps Marussia didn't go under entirely for financial reasons. Maybe the open office layout had something to do with it. No one likes open offices. No one. Ever.
Either way, we feel pretty terrible for the folks who aren't using it anymore.
Marussia has some pretty nifty paintings of team action all around their office. Cover up your naked walls in the coolest way possible: with artwork of a Formula One team that was commissioned and kept by the F1 team themselves.
For more photos from the administrator's tour of the Marussia Formula One team headquarters and more information about the auction itself, check out the announcement here.
All photos belong to the auction announcement listing.