Please Help Us Come Up With Some Hilariously Accurate Road Safety Slogans

Illustration for article titled Please Help Us Come Up With Some Hilariously Accurate Road Safety Slogans

Do the rhyme or do the time. Apparently that’s the motto when it comes to governments and police forces coming up with those hilariously corny road safety slogans. Let’s see if we can do any worse.


Recently in the news is North Carolina’s slogan “Obey The Sign Or Pay The Fine” for its dumb speeding crack-down.

So on that note, first up I thought I’d share some very real road safety slogans to set the example:

  • Alert today – Alive tomorrow.
  • Click It or Ticket
  • Normal speed meets every need.
  • Night doubles traffic troubles.
  • Better be Mister Late than to be Late Mister
  • Look every way every day!
  • Speed thrills but kills!
  • Drive safety rules are your best tools

...and many, many more just as enjoyable over on

So now I’ve come up with a few. Seriously, I live for these sorts of things.

  • use your indicator or answer to the vindicator
  • secure the trunk or secure your junk
  • lock the door or be no more
  • 10 and 2, we see you
  • no spills, more thrills
  • turn on your lights or prepare for the fights
  • clean your car or watch it burn to a char
  • sit up straight or your life wont be great
  • move over for the cops or prepare to be dropped

Now show me if you can do better. What are the worst-best road safety slogans you can come up with? Bonus points in they rhyme.

Reviews Editor, Jalopnik



If you drive slow in the left lane—

I’m going to punch you in the head

Needs work.