Living in Austin, I can always tell who the out-of-town race teams are by whoever shows up in a cowboy hat. This NASCAR Whelen Euro Series recap, however, takes that to a whole 'nother level.

I feel like I've stepped in to a magical American-themed park where all the kitsch of the deep south, Texas and the midwest was put into a blender and poured out over the Tours Speedway. They want you to know that this racin' hails from 'Murica, dagnabbit, and we're gonna out-'Murica the 'Muricans in the process.

Behold! It's like a Texas Roadhouse turned up to 11. Every time I walk into one of those places, I feel slightly offended for my people (ahem, we don't interrupt our mealtimes with random line dancing in the middle of the eatery) yet strangely honored somehow. What other state attracts the focus of mediocre midwest-born chain restaurants?

Yeah, the French are getting parts of it a bit off. The use of a Native American headdress, for example, would definitely raise some eyebrows over here depending on the context of its display. There's a little bit of regional kitsch from a little bit of everywhere, all mashed together in a glorious roundy-round-fueled hoe-down.

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But America, man. They love our racing, and they love our people.

If I was in France, homesick for the land of my people, this looks like the party to be at. It'd be like my vain attempts at finding good BBQ in Washington. I didn't care if I found someone who could replicate east Texas' impeccable pork ribs, or central Texas' melt-in-your-mouth brisket. I just wanted a version of it from somewhere that didn't suck, and regional differences didn't matter. If you're missing the U. S. of A., you're probably missing a little bit of all of it. Might as well throw it all together in one oval-racing weekend celebrating all of the stereotypically American things in one big party.

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Keep on 'Murica-in' on, France. I tip my not-a-cowboy-hat to y'all.

(H/T Corz)