Being a rookie cop and getting laughed at is nothing new, especially if the laughter is coming from protesters and/or your superiors. What is new, it seems, is that everyone laughs at you when you're a rookie cop and a monkey tries to bite your hand off.

Police officer Keith Moore of the Aransas (Texas) Police Department pulled over a driver in a routine traffic stop. When he was giving the driver the electronic copy of the ticket to sign (I hate when cops do that. What happens if I don't sign? Do I not get a ticket? Am I the first person to ever think of this strategy? Lawyers, get back to me) a monkey reached out from behind the driver and bit him.

Immediately, the driver laughs at poor Keith. He scrambles back to his waiting truck, where his sergeant laughs at him. Then he appears on CBS News, where Matt Lauer the CBS guy who is not Matt Lauer laughs at him:

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha," the voices shout at Keith. "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha." And there Keith is, being mocked for his incredible heroism. How stoic.


At no point does anybody care, at all, whether this monkey has a disease or anything. They just cackle.

"Most of the time, the monkey is exceptionally well-behaved. It regularly poses for pictures with people at carnivals," the New York Daily News informs us, in a completely unsourced statement.

H/t to Arpad!