Irish Bookies Issue Odds On Next Automaker Recall

Illustration for article titled Irish Bookies Issue Odds On Next Automaker Recall

Irish bookmaking firm Paddy Power (yes, that's its real name) recently announced that Toyota is the "odds-on 1/3 favorite" carmaker to issue the next major recall. We have no idea what this means, but it sounds important.


Confession time: We know nothing about bookies. We have no idea what a "1/3 favorite" is, we don't know a damn thing about parimutuel betting, and we are wary of men who want to take our money in exchange for something that may not have monetary value. And when it comes to matters mathematical*, we are easily confused.

Still, the Irish are a fun people, and we're always inclined to trust those who seem to be having a good time. If Paddy Power says that Toyota will be the next manufacturer to issue a major product recall, we might as well . . .


Oh, hell. Who are we kidding? What in blazes do a bunch of Irish oddsmakers know about the global car industry? Isn't this a bit ridiculous? Who takes this kind of thing seriously? Is Akio Toyoda going to mount some sort of massive quality campaign based on the ramblings of a bunch of sporting bettors? These people will literally — it's their job — bet on anything. This is like asking a porn star for her opinion on which dildos cure cancer. Completely. Un. Re. Lated.

You know what? Screw this. We apologize for having wasted your time. As penance, we offer up the following video. Enjoy some 250 TR howl. Turn it up. Have a nice day.

*This includes, naturally, equations both the simple and quadratical.


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Hey, simple and quadratic equations are no problem. Hell, even conics would be easy enough with a quick refresher.

Integration, however, is the beginning of the end...

Also, never trust Irish people with money. There's a reason why we're all shit broke, no matter how drunk or happy we may seem.